"I could not make this up."

[babylonsister]

https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2024/11/29/2289313/-I-could-not-make-this-up?pm_campaign=front_page&pm_source=trending&pm_medium=web


I could not make this up.
Friday, November 29, 2024 at 3:11:01p EST
jbear7


I’m an old farm woman living in redneck Indiana, and I dress like a farmer in cold weather — jeans, flannel shirt, jacket, hat and boots. Recently, I was at the local farm and hunting supply store to get horse feed when I needed to use the bathroom. When I came out, a guy came out of the men’s room behind me and said “hey, dude, you were in the wrong bathroom”.

I turned around to see a 30ish-year-old with his winter beard, camo jacket and obligatory 2nd amendment hat. I replied “I’m 70 years old. I think I know which bathroom to use.” He then decides to double-down, gives me the up and down once over and says “So, you’re what a dyke looks like”.

At this point, I almost laughed, but decided to play to his ignorance, and said “Richard, a dike is a small dam that used to hold back water. If I could hold back water, I wouldn’t have been in the bathroom”.

Silence. Confused, finally he says “My name’s not Richard.”, to which I replied, “Really? You look like a Dick to me.”

He shrugged and started to walk away, then said “No, I’m Donnie. Dick’s my twin brother”.

I almost asked if they had a sister named Karen.

[Dennis Donovan]

1. Perhaps this could've taken place 15 years ago, but...

...I think the Trump campaign's constant hammering on transgender and the transgender community gave people like the 30 yr old beardy guy permission to be a complete asshole and talk to another person in that manner.

[tanyev]

2. Yep, the bathroom vigilantes will be going after everyone

whose appearance does not conform to traditional male/female stereotypes.

[travelingthrulife]

25. Maybe that will end it sooner rather than later. The transgender population

is so small that they will invariably end up confronting mostly non-transgendered people, some of whom will be GOP.

[FakeNoose]

38. Maybe they'll "confront" a belligerent person who punches first and asks questions later

That should end it pretty quickly.

[sinkingfeeling]

3. Too stupid to recognize your returned name calling.

[ShazzieB]

60. Right?

That was the funniest part, imo!

The line "Really? You look like a Dick to me" just about killed me. In the best possible way.

I hope the meaning eventually dawned on him and he had enough sense to realize he'd been owned when that happened.

[alfredo]

68. At seventy or older, you automatically get cut some slack. You can

Pretty much speak your mind. Cops leave you alone too.

[alfredo]

71. Getting old allows you to

pretty much speak your mind. Cops leave you alone too.

[surfered]

4. Love It and I agree there are too few Richards and too many Dicks..

[dickthegrouch]

56. I resemble that! /nt

[Irish_Dem]

5. Harassment of women.

Sees a woman coming out of the ladies room dressed in unisex attire.
Verbally attacks her about her gender.

When she states she is female he calls her negative word for gay.

So now women have to dress and behave like the stereotype females.

Maybe we should wear burkas so men can easily identify who is female or not.

[lonely bird]

7. Hmmm

Perhaps men should be required to wear burkas.

[Irish_Dem]

8. Fine by me.

But men would never tolerate being treated like woman are treated.

[usedtobedemgurl]

44. I own three make chastity devices....

Maybe putting those on men will have them rethink things a little.

[TommyT139]

76. Locktober all year long!

They'd need to sit...and that would get security called on them!

[mwooldri]

12. Burqa wouldn't be my recommendation.

John Simpson and a cameraman (male)... were smuggled into Taliban Afghanistan before the US invasion. Both over 6 ft tall. Both wearing burqas.

If the objective is easy identification of women, I would suggest a bikini. Also many t-women who have not had bottom gender confirming surgery are good at hiding their princess wand.

Also the fact that I'm even putting brain power to this....

May this "Richard" go "have a day".

[Irish_Dem]

13. Good point, American men like seeing skin and body parts.

I have always said that American men would mandate
women wear swimsuits or stripper style clothing.

Kind of like Trump mandates the Trump woman look.
Lots of plastic surgery, huge boobs, face distorted in grotesque display of botox and enhancements, wigs and hair pieces, tight, revealing clothing, etc.

[Blue Full Moon]

15. Ferengis from Star Trek.

[Irish_Dem]

16. Yes. The metaphor I always see for the GOP are ferengis.

Evil, greedy, corrupt, bottom feeders.

[ShazzieB]

61. And don't forget the big fake fish lips! 👄

No Trump woman would be complete without a set of those!

[Irish_Dem]

64. Their plastic surgeons should be guilty of malpractice.

The Trump tramps ladies look disfigured for life.

[Kali999]

40. lol

Princess wand cracked me up

[Joinfortmill]

24. None of this will end well for these brutes. We've been here before and we are NOT going back.

[travelingthrulife]

26. I feel like I should probably step up my public bathroom attire.

[Irish_Dem]

29. Very interesting idea.

What will you wear?

[JI7]

50. And if women dress the feminine stereotype then "they were asking for it"

if they get sexually assaulted.

[RandomNumbers]

59. Exactly.

It is about subjugation all around. Removal of autonomy.

[sop]

6. These people have a bizarre preoccupation with transgenderism.

Sigmund Freud would find them interesting.

[niyad]

10. Dear old siggy is responsible for a great deal of grief as a result of his

homophobic, and misogynist "theories".

[Irish_Dem]

31. The entire GOP is stuck in the Phallic stage of development, 3-6 years of age.

Obsession with the genitals.

[Hermit-The-Prog]

65. Fascist oligarchs' propaganda pushes that preoccupation to distract from their agenda and actions.

[soldierant]

72. Yes - back in the 1950s we just took it in our stride. No big deal.

I was born in 1945 and learned about Christine Jorgenson at an age so young I don even remember what age. It was just something that happened. And I learned it openly from my mother, in my home.

[Walleye]

9. Oh dear, I'm a 75-year-old woman. I just ordered a pair of boys Levi's because they fit better, especially for the

29 inch length. So I guess I won’t know where to pee.

[niyad]

11. Perhaps you had better arm yourself with an air horn or some such,

for the inevitable encounters with the stupid and hateful.

[Walleye]

18. I'm thinking a cream pie in the face would be the perfect response to this type of talk

[niyad]

20. That is true, but how many of us would have a handy cream pie? Rather

than waste a perfectly good cream pie, I have found shaving cream to be useful.

[Walleye]

28. Perfect

[Irish_Dem]

36. I'd treat myself to a nice cream pie afterwards.

[niyad]

48. But of course!

[Irish_Dem]

32. Can you practice peeing in a urinal?

[dickthegrouch]

57. There's a device called a Shewee that facilitates that

My doctor told me about them. Didn’t work for me but YMMV.

[Irish_Dem]

58. Sounds delightful. :(

[soldierant]

73. IIRC, they were developed for women scientists working in Antarctica

who without them could have gotten frostbite in some very awkward oarts.

[Blue Full Moon]

14. Have had the same.

I have some acreage and do gardening, cutting back brush and keep chickens. Before that when I was in high school I had a paper route. So boots, jeans, flannel and thermal shirts for working in. And god forbid, I have my keys on a carabiner attached to my purse or backpack so I don't have to fish them out of my purse. Me and my sister went to Walmart to see our mother who worked in lawn and garden. Pick up some fruit trees she had bought. I drove my husband's Dodge truck to get the trees. The guy that was parked beside us in the parking lot yelled lesbians at us. I don't pay attention or make eye contact with those types. So we went a picked up the trees. When I went to get into the truck the guy must have gotten out of his truck because he had spit chewing tobacco all down the handle and door of the new truck.

[Joinfortmill]

27. They're emboldened. I'm going to begin to carry a padlock attached to a scarf.

Anyone tries anything with this old broad, they're gonna get it right smack against the side of the head.

[Hope22]

75. I'd say Pig but that would be an insult to pigs.

I’m sorry you had to deal with someone of this character.

[2naSalit]

17. I think I will...

Resurrect my old response catalogue of responses to sexist assholes. Having been a truck driver running solo all over the country for years, I literally have a million of 'em.

I think, though, now that I'm older, retired, I'm just going to use the more common set of "Fuck Off" responses the most. FO with some personalized quip and a handy, pocket sized, can of pepper spray* will be my defense. I am not afraid to use the spray, I used to train people how to use it and I have had a lifetime of putting up with stupid shit from people with penises.


*Because my roundhouse kick and other defense moves have grown rusty with age. Used to be frighteningly agile.

[niyad]

21. My four-inch heels (either platform or stiletto) and my mace used to be

an automatic part of my daily wear. Now it is just my VERY large, VERY heavy, shoulder strap purse. My razor-sharp tongue has, sadly, never lacked for exercise.

[TNNurse]

19. I love this woman so very much.

Platonically but still love her. I wish I could come back with a comment that quickly.

[Rebl2]

42. Same here

[3auld6phart]

22. Made

My day. Thanks a much needed laugh,, during this dark period…

[Joinfortmill]

23. ROFL.

[LilElf70]

30. Now that's funny

The magats are living in a cloud that does not exist. The stupidity, is really strong in this one. Friggin Magats!!!!!

[ananda]

33. Wow

Amazing

[usonian]

34. The first thing my daughter learned in judo class was how to test someone's "manhood"

with a knee.

Of course, it's just a test.
There are testers and testees.

Flunk him, dearie.

[3catwoman3]

41. I'm not sure if "testees" was an intentional play on words...

...for testes, but it's good either way.

[usonian]

45. Dry humor and plays on words. My specialty of the house.

And the latter is a play on words.
"Alfred Hitchcock Presents", 1959
If you haven't seen it, do so.

[MaineBlueBear]

35. This ties into the emboldened manosphere

Article on AP. It's all part of the ignorance and cruelty running rampant in America now.

Their media will place blame for any violence on liberals and "fake Republicans".

A former acquaintance yelled at me this Summer that the Butler, PA shooter was a "fake Republican". I'll never get that out of my head.

[mountain grammy]

37. Very funny.

Thanks I needed that.

[Hekate]

39. I like this woman a lot. She went into a battle of wits ...

…with an unarmed man.

[3catwoman3]

43. Wow - what a rude jackass.

And dense, too. An example of sarchasm - the gap between biting wit and someone too stupid to get it.

Or, ignoranus - someone who is both stupid and an asshole.

[rainin]

46. Had a thought. What if the reply was to tell him that he may not know this, but the other 50% of the country

believes that men who are fixated on trans people are actually closeted gay or trans people themselves?

Maybe emphasize that "they really think that". Maybe ask "are you? because if you are, that's nothing to be ashamed of"

I'm sure he'll have an aggressive response in the moment, but maybe he'll go home and think about it. He won't want to "look gay" so maybe he'll keep his mouth shut for fear of "looking gay".

I wonder...

[SWBTATTReg]

62. I kind of agree w/ you, why are some people so obsessed w/ this issue? I figure that they are bored w/ life,

or don't have a life, so they end up picking on their victims who happen to just walk by, doing their thing (and are unfortunate victims just walking by these idiots).

[Tumbulu]

69. Exhibit 1: Speaker Johnson, which is sort of obvious

to everyone.

[rainin]

70. Obviously, yes! 90% there on JD Vance.

[ninjanurse]

47. His ma didn't whup him enough

Really, insulting old women? And I play the old card whenever it works.

[niyad]

49. Absolutely. This cranky old Crone is NOT amused, and not in the least

bit hesitant to give them the sharp side of my tongue, or the flat of my purse, whichever the situation indicates.

[niyad]

51. Decisions, decisions. Do I take my 6 ft oak staff, or my 5 ft beech staff

from now on? I fear that my 3 ft maple walking stick will no longer be adequate to the need.

[IA8IT]

52. Living Life at HERO Level!!!! Well Done

[True Blue American]

53. Thanks for that laugh.

Wish it had been a video! 🌈👏🥰😇1️⃣

[thebigidea]

54. Sounds pretty madeup to me.

Shrug.

[IbogaProject]

55. It would be a shame if something bad happened to a few of them

An involuntary gonand reduction might just straighten out those bullies, but just hypothetically we cant condone violence.

[TommyT139]

77. It is however a fact

In some cases (Florida, likely others at this point), a trans person would get more jail time for using the correct-yet-illegal bathroom, than for shooting someone in self-defense.

Of course the transphobes would find a way around this, but on paper, the logic's pretty clear.

That's not advocating violence -- just noting how some states force a choice on people just trying to live their/our lives.

[czarjak]

63. The Silver Lining

Low-hanging fruit always leads to E-Z-pickings.

[Ms. Toad]

66. Bathroom vigilantes have been around forever.

Women who don't fit traditional feminine stereotypes have had their right to use women's bathrooms for decades.

Just because it is more publicized now doesn't mean it has not been a significant issue in the lives of gender-non-conforming women for 4 decades that I am personally aware of - and I doubt the experience is limited to the tube in which I have been aware of it.

[Meowmee]

67. I think it's prolly made up

But still very funny 😀

[ThePartyThatListens]

74. Interesting

We're in for fun times