Women's Rights & Issues
Related: About this forumThe Late-Term Abortion I Didn't Want
By Molly Jong-Fast
A federal judge last week struck down a Mississippi law banning abortion after 15 weeks of pregnancy. Even supporters of abortion rights may wonder why a woman would need an abortion so late.
I was 24 when I accidentally got pregnant... My doctor, serious but chipper, had a very worried look on her face as my husband and I sat in her Fifth Avenue office. She told us: You both carry a Jewish genetic disease called Canavans. OK, my husband said, as I tried to digest the news. The doctor went on: Canavans is fatal. Canavans babies dont live past 5 years old. Since you and your husband are carriers of Canavans, you have a 1 in 4 chance of having an affected fetus. You cannot carry an affected fetus to term. The fatality rate for Canavans disease is 100%.
By this point, I was crying. Youll go and have a chorionic villus sampling, she explained. The technology has since improved, but back then you could only have that test between 10 and 12 weeks. And when the results come back youll be in your second trimester. She paused, then said something that felt like a rebuke: Unfortunately, Im not trained to do second-trimester abortions, so youd have to find someone else.
(snip)
For the next 10 days I thought about the idea of getting rid of a baby I had grown to want desperately. A Canavans baby would have seizures, its brain would deteriorate, it would become paralyzed and blind, and eventually ithewould die. He would spend years in agonizing decay, and wed have to watch every day of it... We arrived at the genetic counselors office to learn our results. It turned out we won the lottery. My baby was not affected, not even a carrier.
He was born the following January, a strapping 9 pounds, 5 ounces. He is now 14, a freshman in high school. Having him was the greatest decision I ever made, but being forced to carry a terminally ill baby would have been the greatest tragedy of my life. That is why I am committed to keeping second-trimester abortions safe and legal.
https://www.wsj.com/articles/the-late-term-abortion-i-didnt-want-1543276878 (paid subscription)
MontanaMama
(24,023 posts)I got pregnant for a 3rd time when I was 41. I was thrilled and terrified at the same time. My obstetrician recommended genetic counseling and testing which my husband and I decided to go ahead with. The tests that were recommended had to be performed after 8 weeks gestation. We traveled 3 hours to see a doctor that could do the tests...taking a sample of the placenta which presented its own risks by itself and then had to wait at least two weeks for the results. It was agonizing. We had many heart wrenching conversations about what we would do if the tests came back positive for something terrible. 18 days after the genetic tests, I got a call that I could expect a genetically healthy baby. We did not find out the sex. I felt I had dodged a bullet and whether the baby was a boy or girl did not matter to me. It was not an easy pregnancy. I was on bed rest for the final 10 weeks but gave birth to a healthy 7lb baby boy who is now 13 and the love of my life. If my tests had come back differently I dont know what decision I would have made in that moment. Regardless, any woman in that position should have the right to make that decision.
stopwastingmymoney
(2,144 posts)Everyone should read and digest this and understand why these late term bans are so cruel
rusty quoin
(6,133 posts)Duppers
(28,246 posts)Because it's just too emotional. But here's a summary: my baby was born with two *diagnosed birth defects* that ended in her death a few hours after her birth. My OB/GYN made me carry her to term, three decades ago, because he practiced medicine at a Catholic hospital.
This is very personal for me and to this day, I'm angry about it. Coincidentally, this came up this afternoon with my hubby.
Support the right to choose wisely. To the goons, it's always an open-and-shut case, which in reality is far from the truth.
dawg day
(7,947 posts)The "pro-lifers" don't get it-- how very painful it is to love and lose, and they just want to make it even worse.
Late-term abortions are so often about sparing the child pain. The parents will have anguish no matter what, but less if they can spare the baby pain by ending it sooner.
Duppers
(28,246 posts)She had to struggle and suffer.
And this is what I've tried to explain to thick-headed fundies, including my own mother. But to no avail, gawd's will and all.
Thank you so, so much. I appreciate your understanding and care.
question everything
(48,811 posts)and how this deeply affects you and will for the rest of your life.
I wonder whether in those days there were support groups. And, perhaps, it is not too late to find one now.
Liberal Insights
(109 posts)please help get the word out about http://ChristianChoice.Org