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Here's another great article on how to handle grief: (Original Post) CaliforniaPeggy Aug 2015 OP
Great article. ohheckyeah Aug 2015 #1
Oh my dear ohheckyeah... CaliforniaPeggy Aug 2015 #2
You're a ohheckyeah Aug 2015 #3
Aw, thanks! CaliforniaPeggy Aug 2015 #4
I never ohheckyeah Aug 2015 #5
I'm glad to hear about the positives in your life! CaliforniaPeggy Aug 2015 #6
Oliver Sacks posted another beautiful piece this week n2doc Aug 2015 #7
He is an amazing writer! I love his works. CaliforniaPeggy Aug 2015 #8

ohheckyeah

(9,314 posts)
1. Great article.
Wed Aug 12, 2015, 01:39 AM
Aug 2015

I'm still in the 100' wave phase. Dealing with disabilities from a stroke at the same time adds another layer of misery.

The only thing that makes the stroke bear able is the fact my dad drove to my house once or twice a week for a year (a 50 mile round trip and he was 88)- up until his last two weeks of his life. I got to spend some real quality time with him but it made the pain even more real when he died. I'd rather have the pain and the memories we made in that year.

I miss my dad horribly.

His birthday is in 10 days and I'm bracing for it.

CaliforniaPeggy

(152,097 posts)
2. Oh my dear ohheckyeah...
Wed Aug 12, 2015, 10:07 AM
Aug 2015

I'm so glad the article helped you.

At the same time, I hate that you're dealing with the disabilities from a stroke. That has got to be so hard.

I've got your back.

CaliforniaPeggy

(152,097 posts)
4. Aw, thanks!
Wed Aug 12, 2015, 02:45 PM
Aug 2015

I have a very small idea of what you're going through...

I don't want you to feel isolated.

ohheckyeah

(9,314 posts)
5. I never
Wed Aug 12, 2015, 02:59 PM
Aug 2015

thought I'd be in a wheelchair for a year or unable to use my right hand. The stroke exasperated pain from other issues I had like back surgery and fibromyalgia.

I did actually make me a pizza from Chef Boy R D yesterday and it was the best thing taste wise I've had in a year...LOL. Better than lobster and I love lobster.

Fortunately, my mom and siblings are doing pretty well and are as supportive as they know how to be. My husband has been a gem but he's grieving, too. He and my dad were close.

I know I was blessed to have dad so long and that he went quickly and quietly in his sleep just as he wanted. He was a special person.

CaliforniaPeggy

(152,097 posts)
6. I'm glad to hear about the positives in your life!
Wed Aug 12, 2015, 03:33 PM
Aug 2015

Those surely help.

And bravo for making that pizza! Getting even the smallest bit of your competency back can be huge. I know I hate to be helpless.

Going quickly and quietly in one's sleep is a blessing for the person, and extremely tough on everyone else. It helps to remember that he might have suffered so much more otherwise.

I can tell from what you've said about him that he was special. I'm glad.

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