Tonight I got some very good news.......and now I'm sad.
How can it be that something good can make me smile and hurt deeply all at the same time?
Normally I would be sharing my good news with my dear newly passed friend......but of course, I cannot. Oh boy and it hurts.
This is the first big piece of good news since he died, and I know there will be more times that this will happen. I only hope the pain that comes with it will ease.
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You are grieving, and it seems, doing so mindfully.
That's a good thing. 
He would normally be one that I would share good, or bad news with immediately. He always wanted to know how I was doing. It is so tough.
I was a nurse, so grieving is something I know a little about. Knowing helps.
Thanks, my dear Wilms...
One of the big things about grief is that you feel so alone, as though nobody ever felt this way before, and of course that's not true. So when someone you like and respect comes along to help, that sense of loneliness diminishes.
You are so right about it being exhausting! It takes my joy and my strength away. I am taking as good care of myself as I can...
Thank you for all your good thoughts.
is so tough. I've always been quick to laugh and joke until May.
Wish we could exchange hugs.
I guess we just need to believe it gets easier. I saw a Garfield comic that I know my Dad would have cut out and put on my refrigerator - we would have laughed over it together. I cried and then was sad because nobody else got it like he would.
Grief sucks.
to CaliforniaPeggy
to all of us grieving.
But I always remember that the deeper the love, the deeper the grief.
And that helps too.
Thanks for the hugs..........
It will never really go away, but just be less sad as time goes on. I've had some opportunities to learn about that one, the latest being my sister's passing earlier this year.
Take care and be strong. 
It's been 18 years and still it's so fresh in my mind. Fresh enough that I still want to pick up the phone and say "whatcha doin' mum?"
I too must be a glass 1/2 empty person. Remembering the good times only makes me long for them. I still cry a LOT. I've been so ill the last 2-3 years and when I'm at my worst I think how wonderful it would be to join her.
Many well meaning folks assure me she's 'waiting up there for me' and 'what a happy reunion you'll have together' I dunno, I can't wrap my head around all of that.
Life goes on though, different as it may be.
My heart goes out to you Orleans, we are kindred spirits I think. Sharing this horrible journey that so many have been forced to share with us.
I'm thankful for the people in this group. They say misery loves company. That couldn't be farther from the truth. Misery needs understanding and understanding comes from experience, experience that none of us have enjoyed.
So, while it does get different, it never gets better. I think.
kesha
A couple of times I have felt something indefinable in my study. This is the room where we did so much talking: on the computer, or the phone. A couple of times I have felt a warmth somehow here.......and I thought maybe it was his spirit.
I hope so.
Thank you!
I remember that saying from some literature class but can't remember who wrote it.
Beloved could also mean beloved friend and beauty could also be expanded to something nice or wonderful.
So many of us go through this.
By the way, I "talk" to my mother and other deceased people all
the time-- very privately and briefly, of course--when the spirit moves me.
It's certainly true, too.
I talk to my missing friend too......also privately and briefly. We always had so much fun talking...
Dante Gabriel Rossetti apparently said it...