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irisblue

(34,265 posts)
1. I am meandering on
Wed Jun 22, 2016, 11:54 PM
Jun 2016

great loss. Great pain .Somedays I think I am takinging "too long" today is a an as long as it takes day...

orleans

(34,965 posts)
3. i've been in the process of selling my house
Thu Jun 23, 2016, 08:21 AM
Jun 2016

(my mom's house) for the past six months and am heartbroken to leave it

i can't/won't get into it now but i've been in the process of anticipatory grief over this house for as long as my mom has been gone (over six years now).

i sat outside the other night, knowing it was my last full moon from the backyard. cried my eyes out. i've been here for 51 years.

the grief over having to lose this place has been tremendous

but i ran out the clock and then some

i've never really moved before (except when i was seven and moved here)

i hate goodbyes.

and change

 

KMOD

(7,906 posts)
5. change can be so very hard
Thu Jun 23, 2016, 08:54 AM
Jun 2016

especially when there is such a sentimental attachment.

When we had to sell my mom's house, I took a few shoots from the lilac bush and some bulbs from the day lilies and replanted them at my house. It gives me some comfort and memories when they bloom each spring.

Is there something you can take with you? A root from a favorite plant or tree?

orleans

(34,965 posts)
6. i'm taking as much as possible
Thu Jun 23, 2016, 11:37 AM
Jun 2016

at least inside
including my mother's room, although there will not be a separate room for her furniture--i can't afford a three bedroom condo
friends and neighbors are taking as much as they want from the yard--otherwise everything will die--it's all getting torn up and torn down

i grew up here, i raised my daughter here, i have always been here, this place is my solace.

there is no planting anything at the condo--otherwise that would be a great idea.

anyway...

nothing--not a fucking thing--i can do about it. i tried. i tried my best.

the moving day is getting closer; i think i'm entering into a weird sort of shock stage--feeling rather numb, and dead inside.

oh well. i can't fix it and i can't change it.

perhaps i will adapt to my new surroundings. (honestly i never thought i'd get this far)

No Vested Interest

(5,196 posts)
7. As soon as you arrive at your new home, hang a few familiar photos or pictures.
Thu Jun 23, 2016, 04:55 PM
Jun 2016

Use existing hooks, if necessary. -(You can always move them later if you choose.)

A large photo or drawing of the old home is a good choice for starters. - It will be reassuring to see the familiar.)



 

KMOD

(7,906 posts)
8. I'm so sorry,
Thu Jun 23, 2016, 10:20 PM
Jun 2016

I don't know what to say, except that I care, and I'm here if you ever want to reach out.

auntAgonist

(17,257 posts)
10. Orleans, I'm like you, I hate goodbyes and have come to realize
Fri Jun 24, 2016, 06:16 AM
Jun 2016

that you have to say 'goodbye' to be able to move on but you don't have to forget the beautiful things from your past.

When I read "six years" I audibly gasped! How time passes and leaves us behind in our grief and longing for happier places.

You have soldiered on and deserve some real positive changes in your life my friend.

You know I am here for you any time you feel a need or just a desire to talk to someone. I'm always here for everyone in the group.

We've become our own little family here and we support one another as best we can.


Crying is good therapy.
Take lots of photos and write down some of your most favourite and happiest memories.

auntAgonist

(17,257 posts)
9. Hi there KMOD!! Thank you so so much for this beautiful piece.
Fri Jun 24, 2016, 06:07 AM
Jun 2016

So many of our group are struggling and this video has come at a good time for a lot of us.

I hope you're doing alright.

with gratitude.

kesha

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