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meadowlander

(4,820 posts)
16. I think you need to go back to what your friend actually wrote.
Sat Jul 16, 2022, 12:01 AM
Jul 2022

Women are not put on this earth to be looked at. Not "men should not be looking at women".

Straight men might like to look at them but that is not the reason the woman exists in most situations. Most of the time she's just buying bread or doing her job or talking to her friend or any of the other millions of reasons a woman, as a variation of human being, might want to exist in a public space.

The problem is when either:

1. it goes beyond a normal look registering the existence of the woman and turns into staring, catcalling, space crowding, taking pictures without consent, abnormally solicitous attention (like holding the door open for her and letting it slam in the face of her obese friend) or any other variation of creeping on a woman who is just going about her day.

2. the price of entry into a situation is a woman looking "presentable" and "presentable" is defined as "attractive to the male gaze". For example, black tie work networking events where a woman would be turned away at the door if she wasn't wearing a cocktail dress, heels and make up.

That's what your friend is talking about. Not "men you must train yourself to never look at a woman let alone register attraction!" It is possible to look at a woman you think is attractive and also register her as a human being who deserves respect and it is possible to acknowledge the existence of and extend respect to women whose sole goal in life is not to appear attractive to you.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

I'm a straight male and pass on this poll. Lochloosa Jul 2022 #1
Should allow multiple responses HelpImSurrounded Jul 2022 #2
Hmmmm... qwlauren35 Jul 2022 #5
In a single line? I doubt it HelpImSurrounded Jul 2022 #10
I can relate to practically everything you've written True Dough Jul 2022 #19
Hey! Dirty old men need love too... Wounded Bear Jul 2022 #31
Wait a second, Wounded Bear True Dough Jul 2022 #32
Nope, more like this guy... Wounded Bear Jul 2022 #33
Other mvd Jul 2022 #3
No idea but I'm a straight woman and I notice nice looking men. Phoenix61 Jul 2022 #4
I hear you. qwlauren35 Jul 2022 #13
The photoshopping of either sex annoys me. Phoenix61 Jul 2022 #15
Well said Doc Sportello Jul 2022 #26
I passed because I simply enjoy looking at people - I enjoy the diversity of looks, clothes, NewHendoLib Jul 2022 #6
I'm a straight male... House of Roberts Jul 2022 #7
I'll check what I typed. Sorry. qwlauren35 Jul 2022 #14
What about the "I'm a gay male and I enjoy looking at women that I find attractive" option? TexasTowelie Jul 2022 #8
As I've gotten older I think it's kind of creepy when I check out younger women captain queeg Jul 2022 #9
Well gay texan Jul 2022 #11
I've gone on group model shoots a few times edbermac Jul 2022 #12
I understand the need for cosmetic surgery and even implants... Wounded Bear Jul 2022 #35
I think you need to go back to what your friend actually wrote. meadowlander Jul 2022 #16
+1 LizBeth Jul 2022 #22
+1 demmiblue Jul 2022 #23
2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 (nt) petronius Jul 2022 #17
Well yeah. BlueTsunami2018 Jul 2022 #18
Where is - "I am a gay woman and I enjoy looking at women. Period"? OhZone Jul 2022 #20
I'm going to ramble a bit... and probably make a few people very angry. Layzeebeaver Jul 2022 #21
I'm a straight, old woman. I stared at two men, openly. It was in Venice and I was crossing the CTyankee Jul 2022 #24
What the fuck is this shit right here WhiskeyGrinder Jul 2022 #25
Yep. Iggo Jul 2022 #30
I am a straight male and I enjoy looking at all sorts of people - I am a photographer GoneOffShore Jul 2022 #27
Much more rewarding watching flowers 48656c6c6f20 Jul 2022 #28
I thought it couldn't get dumber than the Ivana threads. Iggo Jul 2022 #29
I won't ForgedCrank Jul 2022 #34
Leering makes women uncomfortable. I suggest men stop doing it. boston bean Jul 2022 #36
Yes it's DU newdayneeded Jul 2022 #38
Especially at the nude beach Polybius Jul 2022 #39
Yeah. Just another grenade rolled into the room. Iggo Jul 2022 #40
There's nothing wrong with straight men looking at women, especially women they highplainsdem Jul 2022 #37
After a review by forum hosts....LOCKING Omaha Steve Jul 2022 #41
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