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radicalliberal

(907 posts)
26. Nonathletic boys' problems are caused by those who tell them that they're less manly . . .
Tue Jul 9, 2013, 11:29 PM
Jul 2013

. . . simply because they're not interested in sports. I ought to know. I grew up with that routine in spades.

I was also taught by the culture at school and elsewhere that empathy and compassion were "feminine" traits, which therefore were undesirable in men. Despite the fact that these two traits have often been the driving force behind great acts of courage. Would Esquire magazine, one of the leading proponents of machismo, ever feature any articles about Martin Luther King Jr., Dr. Andrei Sakharov, or Raoul Wallenberg? Nah, that's "sissy" stuff!

I love this phony issue of late regarding the supposed "feminization" or "wussification" of America (often accompanied with a defense of bullying in the schools) that has been blathered about elsewhere. How wonderfully right-wing that is! Perhaps we should get the extreme right-wing gay guy named Jack Donovan (actually not his real name), who frequently lectures straight guys for supposedly not being masculine enough as he wields his plastic Conan sword about and extols the virtues of John Wayne, a white racist conservative Republican who never served in a war. (It is to laugh.) I'm sure he'd set us straight!

I should admit that I haven't watched this entire video. I stopped after he spoke about the "narrow box" regarding the socialization of boys. That's a bit too painful for me. He's dead right about the "narrow box." I was painfully aware of that reality when I was a kid. Perhaps he brings up another issue of which I'm not aware later in the video. Maybe that would be a different matter. Perhaps I'd disagree with him, but probably not. (I just thought I'd throw that one in for fun. Y'all don't have :mrgreen: .)

I'm not scared of my testosterone. Medically speaking, at the age of 64, I'm quite grateful my body still manufactures it in abundance. (I certainly don't have to take Viagra! ) I'm sure it's been helpful in my bodybuilding program, which has involved a lot of work and slow progress. But I'm not driven by my "testosterone" (speaking from a psychological/social point of view now) to ridicule some other guy because he has a scrawny build or because he's fat. In fact, I would regard such a view to be completely stupid. I suppose I should show how "tough" I am by becoming some sort of bully, something I've detested all of my life.

I'm on a bodybuilding program simply to feel good about myself. (Well, also because I've got late onset type II diabetes and have therefore got to exercise!) Unlike some other people (women as well as men), I don't feel compelled to get on some campaign to put down some guys simply because they supposedly aren't masculine enough according to standards that are superficial and phony. Besides, it's none of my business!

I'm also quite aware that a guy who happens to be physically weaker than I may be more intelligent, spiritual, or courageous than I. Why? Because I know just how diverse boys and men are. After all, we comprise half the human race; so, there's bound to be a lot of variety. But some (such as all the proponents of machismo) want all men to be the same. Has never been, 'twill never be.

Yes and no. lumberjack_jeff Dec 2011 #1
Don't throw out the baby with the bathwater, so to speak. I certainly don't disagree with that. nomorenomore08 Jul 2013 #20
So can I come into the Feminists group and post a video of what I think women should be like? Warren DeMontague Dec 2011 #2
Let me answer that -- no. nt. mistertrickster Feb 2012 #12
+ 1000 opiate69 Feb 2012 #13
good point, not sure anybody has the rights answers when it comes to stuff like this loli phabay Jul 2013 #15
+1 nomorenomore08 Jul 2013 #21
Crap, I can't even get along with -myself-, some days. Warren DeMontague Jul 2013 #30
i cant even go there. I was a big meanie! galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #19
lol.. join the club... opiate69 Jul 2013 #22
he is a saint with the gift of patience, to be sure. nt galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #25
Bwahahaha! lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #31
I watched it dipsydoodle Dec 2011 #3
Its so much more than just violence that needs to be addressed. HuskiesHowls Dec 2011 #4
"where males are taught from little up that they have to be the provider" ISNT paternalistic galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #27
Good point!! HuskiesHowls Jul 2013 #43
This is tough to believe Doctor_J Jul 2013 #38
As a society, we are taught violence wins. HuskiesHowls Jul 2013 #44
Jackson Katz is full of it.. Upton Dec 2011 #5
The world is changing. lumberjack_jeff Dec 2011 #6
The world may be changing.. Upton Dec 2011 #7
What "attributes" are you talking about? plantwomyn Dec 2011 #8
What to attribute the "seeming acceptance of violence against women and children"? lumberjack_jeff Dec 2011 #9
You state that the "operative phrase is "seeming" plantwomyn Dec 2011 #10
"women's responsibility for teaching sons and... the men around them" lumberjack_jeff Dec 2011 #11
pretty sure the last people i would want advising me are the extreme feminists loli phabay Jul 2013 #16
I'm not sure I'd ever take my cue from you. radicalliberal Jul 2013 #14
mens problems are caused by men listening to bullshit like this. galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #18
Nonathletic boys' problems are caused by those who tell them that they're less manly . . . radicalliberal Jul 2013 #26
ah, man you seem cool and I'm not trying to down you. i respect your experience. galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #28
Thank you very much for the kind compliments. :) radicalliberal Jul 2013 #33
I think you're conflating machismo and masculinity unfairly. lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #32
You've made a good point. :) radicalliberal Jul 2013 #34
^ Wall of truth Dash87 Jul 2013 #36
I agree! Do you know what's ludicrous? radicalliberal Jul 2013 #40
Attack of the zombie thread!!! opiate69 Jul 2013 #41
Excellent! lol radicalliberal Jul 2013 #42
great example of a "nice guy" attempting to engender himself to the ladies (and get laid) galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #17
I guess I'm not quite so cynical about it. I believe his intentions are good, but as you put it nomorenomore08 Jul 2013 #23
i totally understand and appreciate your view galileoreloaded Jul 2013 #24
I do think there's a good bit of truth to what you just said. nomorenomore08 Jul 2013 #29
Not really... rrneck Jul 2013 #35
+1000. A must-see TED talk. n/t lumberjack_jeff Jul 2013 #39
That reminds me. I haven't watched Hard Target in probably a year Doctor_J Jul 2013 #37
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