DEEPLY disappointed...to the point of tears.

[TSExile]

I have already shared with you all about my dad and his yard sign. My mom, back in 2022 watching the 1/6 hearings with me, said she would never vote for the RAPIST again. She also said she can never vote D, so she would skip voting for President and just vote down ballot. Both my parents are staunch Republicans, always have been, both sets of my grandparents were staunch Republicans...

I want to scream and yell that this isn't the Republican Party they grew up with. It's not the party of Lincoln and Ike anymore and hasn't been for decades. Well, this morning my folks decided to go to the Board of Elections and vote early. Mom said that she will vote for the RAPIST because he is more palatable than Harris/Walz. For some reason I cannot understand, neither parent likes them.

Many of you know that I been very forthright about my sexual assault back in 2015, right when T**** was beginning his climb up the political ladder. His treatment of people he despises, especially women, got my guard up. With E. Jean Carroll, it felt especially personal to me. My parents and rest of my immediate family would vote for a known sexual assaulter, knowing my own story...just because he is on the Republican ticket, not Democratic.

I honestly love my parents and get along great with them outside of politics. Where did I go wrong? 💔

[Aristus]

1. You didn't go wrong. They did.

What would be more painful for you? Cutting them out of your life? Or staying in touch with them?

You don’t owe them anything. Choose the less painful option, and look after yourself.

[Ontheboundry]

4. Did you tell her to

Cut her parents out of her life? I have reread this several times and that is what I'm reading (or suggesting )

[Aristus]

8. Yeah. She's a sexual assault survivor, and her parents are voting for a rapist.

Cutting them out of her life is a reasonable option for handling the pain they’re causing her.

[soandso]

16. That's the OP's decision

not yours. She may value the love they share.

I'm curious - if you found yourself in a situation where you could help someone in an emergency - maybe even save their life - would you ask their political positions, first, or just do it?

[Aristus]

19. Of course it's her choice. Which I clearly recognized in my post.

As to your question about me; you must be new here. I’m a Physician Assistant working in the field of public health primary care. I’ve spent the last fifteen years treating patients who sometimes have wildly different beliefs from my own.

On my office wall, I have a commendation for arranging a total knee replacement surgery for a homeless veteran who openly and vocally despised President Obama, and railed against liberals.

I don’t think he ever figured out that I’m a liberal who voted twice for President Obama, and even if he had, I don’t think he would have refused the surgical procedure that led to a significant improvement in his quality of life.

[soandso]

20. That's all very nice

and you had no personal history with the veteran. I guess that's because you thought his value was something beyond and above his political views. Now, imagine the personal connection and the history the OP has with her mother.

[Tickle]

21. Nice job 👍 NT

[Aristus]

22. I don't need to imagine it; she spelled it out for us.

And she's free to listen to, and consider the responses her post will generate, or not. It's what a discussion forum is all about.

[niyad]

27. Sighhhh. Perhaps you could read that first response again, since you seem to have

missed the part where the poster clearly says for her to do whatever is best for her. But do keep trying.

[soandso]

33. I did read it

but then the poster followed with this:

Cutting them out of her life is a reasonable option for handling the pain they’re causing her.

That's what I responded to.

[niyad]

36. Do keep trying.

[soandso]

39. What's your point?

Keep trying what - stating my opinion? It's not an easy issue and as this thread and previous ones have shown, not everyone chooses to end relationships over political differences. Some do, some don't and it's a highly personal decision.

[Jack Valentino]

40. Re-read your own post, and then ask yourself, what is YOUR point??

I don't see much difference between what you and Aristus have stated here---
so I don't quite understand why you are taking issue with what they posted.

[Dan]

23. She/he offered options, my reading of it.

[BattleRow]

32. It's the same blind allegiance as with predator priests.

They will not give you the support and dignity you deserve as a victim,but,honor and respect the perpetrator instead.

Indoctrinated to perceived authority figures,abdicating independent thought .

[3catwoman3]

2. That must hurt like hell.

And Trump is not palatable in any way, whatsoever.

[BlueKota]

3. I am so sorry

Last edited Wed Oct 30, 2024, 06:27 PM - Edit history (1)

It's truly both sad and scary that people who we love can't see what an evil monster that man is.

[Different Drummer]

5. " It's not the party of Lincoln and Ike anymore and hasn't been for decades."

I keep telling my mom, a staunch Republican, this very thing. It falls on deaf ears every time. She supported Barry Goldwater in 1964 and hasn't changed her views. You can't save 'em all.

[MLAA]

6. Have you been able to tell them why them choosing a sexual assaulter/rapist is so painful for you? I sure understand if

haven’t been able to after going through such an unbelievably awful event. I’m so, so sorry. ❤️💖❤️. Sending you lots of love.

[Coventina]

7. First of all, please know that you are not alone.

The feeling of betrayal you have is very valid and MANY of your sisters are experiencing it along with you.

Other than that, I don't have a lot of good advice.

My mother died in 2003, but my dad has morphed from a Trump hater to a Trump lover.
(Yes, Trump is gaining support, regardless of what you might be told. Frightening and disturbing on so many levels).

It hurts like HELL to be a rape survivor, or abuse survivor, or other person who has been personally affected by the behaviors this despicable band of abuses and users espouse.

When those you once felt closest to cheer on the rapist, it hurts very deeply.

I'm right there with you.

[TSExile]

41. Thank you...

[usonian]

9. The Republican cult is all about blame. Dems are all about service and responsibility to self and others.

It's a tough habit to break, like an addiction (I have looked into such things )

And they're being "gamed" brilliantly.



Convince losers that they're winners while picking their pocket.

[soandso]

10. Think of it this way

"Vote blue no matter who". You know that phrase and what it means. That's what they did. They voted party. Lots of Rs don't like their candidate but still support their party platform and it's positions. That's all it is. You didn't fail anyone. They have their own opinions and beliefs and you have yours and that you all love each other, regardless of those differences, is wonderful. Be grateful for that. Every human is like a little universe, distinct from all of the other ones, and you only control your own. That's the way it works.

[usonian]

11. Smother them with kindness.

Most conservatives like to vote on election day.

Buy them a ticket for an all-day Nov 5 event. I suggest:
• Demolition Derby,
• Duck Hunt,
• boat ride,
• vineyard tour or
• County Fair

Or a short cruise encompassing Nov 5.

This does not solve the problem, but since EVERY VOTE COUNTS, might save the country!!

Though, NOT EVERY COUNT VOTES



and for what it's worth (probably not much help for you)
Republicans Voting For Kamala Harris Over Donald Trump Are Sharing The Reasons Why, And This Makes So Much Sense

https://www.buzzfeed.com/morgansloss1/republicans-voting-for-kamala-harris-share-why

Part of my "talking points" post, which I am kicking daily.
https://democraticunderground.com/100219575973

Understand your disappointment. I never had such trauma. Just going to boot camp was jarring enough.
My Dad voted for Raygun Ronnie.
He later said that "This is the first time I didn't get a tax refund."
I explained why.

Someone else did.

[Conjuay]

24. Yeah,Raygun could do no wrong in my father in laws eyes.

Until Ronnie went after his VA Disability benefits.
But as smart as he was, he didn't figure out Rush Limbaugh wasn't he friend, not was any of the up and coming Republicans.

[soldierant]

30. Yeah -

[jfz9580m]

12. I am sorry to hear that

Last edited Wed Oct 30, 2024, 07:40 PM - Edit history (3)

I am also very sorry to hear about the assault.
Sometimes you have to try to separate people you love from their politics. I don’t advocate for cutting out people you actually love (if they are kind to you and decent in general, but have insane politics).

But I know it is hard. My own strategy is to just avoid politics with people who generally seem nice, but have awful political views. I have met a few people like that where they are genuinely nice people with atrocious views..it usually comes off as the result consumption of poisoned media. I do make a distinction between average people and actual movement people (conservative politicians, activists and media).

I do think people can have insane politics/be very clueless and still not be bad humans so much as kinda stupid in their views. I think one has to believe in the redemption of the less hopeless people. Trump, Musk, Vance..ie all of the GOP politicians and their media/billionaire allies are of course irredeemable.

It is poisoning by the media or cluelessness in most others (that is my hope anyway). It is hard to buy that a full third to a half of humanity are that awful all the way. (I am not saying people with awful views are awesome. Just not irredeemable in a less brainwashed-by-media society. I definitely do not mean it in the hideous Steven Pinker/Jonathan Haidt moronic, Panglossian conservative way “ All people are good and have awesome ideas! Somehow the planet inexplicably sucks!” It is just that one hopes with better education and less pap, humans could be a less stupid species. ).

All that said, it is hard to listen to such views.
Hang in there. You have your DU family to unburden to.

[The Grand Illuminist]

13. What is the greater good?

nt

[totodeinhere]

14. You did not go wrong. They have a right to vote as they wish and all you can do is advise them.

If they do not take your advice that's their problem and not yours.

[harumph]

15. even before dementia is diagnosed, flexibility of thinking declines with age and poor health

[bdamomma]

17. You didn't go wrong.

Is it party over country for your parents???? Do they see he's going to be a dictator on day 1. It's Democracy or Autocracy??? What don't they get??????

You did not go wrong.

[brush]

18. Sad. They sound like they're full of every other...ism in the book. In regards to VP Harris...

IMO it's the two biggest, most disgusting ones...the N-word and S-word.

[Joinfortmill]

25. You didnt.

[Mark.b2]

26. For me, I just have some relationships where politics is set aside...

Some I set aside religion, some I set aside the fact they are Tx Longhorn fans. It works for me.

When I’m with family, even though they know my politics, we just don’t bring it up, other than an occasional ribbing.

But, I know that not everyone can do it that way. I’m thankful for my situation.

[thesquanderer]

28. re: "For some reason I cannot understand, neither parent likes them."

The reason is often Fox.

[yaesu]

29. There are a lot of family maga's that disappoint me and frankly I no longer trust them nor care to be around them

I think supporting a lifetime con artist, convicted felon, rapist and soviet agent really shows a flaw in character that I can't simply ignore.

[slightlv]

31. TSExile... you didn't go wrong...

you turned out great despite your parental units! It's hard, tho... I have a brother just like that. He's a one issue voter - guns. Though he's said for years he has more than he'll ever use and isn't in the market for more. He's not really intellectual, so you can't talk to him on a logical, intellectual level. He is completely driven by emotions, which are so easily riled by the republican party, unfortunately.

[mdbl]

34. Luckily, my parents aren't like that.

But I have relatives I won't associate with any longer because of this. It's an affront to human decency for ANYONE to support that fascist dictator. He is right there with Hitler and if they are too stupid to realize it they can just sit in their own echo chamber waiting for karma to kick them in the ass. Unfortunately, they are intent on dooming all of us.

[orleans]

35. did you remind your mom what she said in 2022, that she'd never vote for trump again?

and that she said she'd just vote down ballot?

wonder what happened with that idea

wonder if your parents think what happened to you in 2015 was a long time ago so it either doesn't matter anymore, or you're probably over it by now, or you *should* be over it by now

wonder if your parents have fallen under the spell of fox news in which case a squirrel (or person) might chew through or cut the outside cable line and a masked individual might steal the yard sign and put it in their trunk or simply go over it with a can of black spray paint

well, as the old saying goes: "trump before family and especially before kids because kids...what the hell do they know?"

(has fox news informed them that kamala wants to have "medicare at home" so they won't have to be put in a nursing home and you won't have to stay at home and take care of them in spite of the three jobs you'll be working when trump and musk crash the economy and trump drains out medicare because the only thing he wants to give old people is a boot up their ass?)

Harris’s plan for ‘Medicare at Home’ would revolutionize care in America
https://thehill.com/opinion/healthcare/4953745-harriss-plan-for-medicare-at-home-would-revolutionize-care-in-america/

i'm really sorry TSExile -- i would feel so betrayed if my parents had done something like that, and especially with that excuse of some fucked up political party that couldn't bring themselves to not vote for


p.s. this is some of what they're voting for:
https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-news/elon-musk-agrees-trump-win-economic-crash-1235146307/

[Liberal In Texas]

37. I'm going to guess this is a result of hours and hours of propaganda being pumped right into

their living room from Fox Newschannel, Newsmax, OAN or any other of the lesser feeder channels and video that repeat the talking points and make them or lurid and vivid in an effort to be noticed.

The constant demonization of Democrats and now VP Harris has actually brainwashed them. They truly believe what they're hearing. It's sad, because there just isn't any good way or maybe any way to "deprogram" them without them coming to the realization they've been had themselves.

I'm guessing if you mentioned that the Trump administration will be going after their SS and Medicare they didn't believe you. (Social Security is on the chopping block for around 30% cuts, and that will be just the start.)

[TSExile]

38. Here's what's really weird.

My parents, praise be to God, have never gotten into the T**** Butt-Kissing Network (aka the Fox Propaganda Channel), OAN or Newsmax. They watch mostly local news and then half an hour of Lester Holt or David Muir. Then, it's either "The First 48" or HGTV.

I love my parents very much and I simply don't understand their politics. They are hardworking, kind and otherwise sane people. Same goes for my sister and her husband. I just don't get it. If my financial straits weren't so dire, I would definitely move out. (Though I am exceedingly grateful that they let me stay with them.) Thank you all for letting me vent. I feel heard here.

[jfz9580m]

43. As a fellow childless catlady I hear you

I too feel heard here and it is good for my mental health. I wasn’t here during the first Trump term and that definitely made it harder.

[Polybius]

42. May I ask what state they are in?

Please tell me it's not a Swing State.

[TSExile]

46. No, thankfully.

Ohio.

[DeepWinter]

44. You didn't go wrong. They didn't go wrong.

I learned long ago to not let politics poison my relationships. I'd probably lose 80% of the people in my life if I was a political idealogue and absolutist. And they're a lot of good people. I'm happier with them in my life than if they were not in my life. And the overwhelming amount of conversation and interaction I have with people is not about politics. As with everything else, focus on the positives and don't dwell on or let the negatives pull you down.

[mackdaddy]

45. Have you seen the documentary 'The Brainwashing of my Dad'?

Fox news is like a 24/7 indoctrination stream, and has only gotten worse in the 8 years since this came out.

Maybe it would help you understand what has happened to them.

It is on amazon prime.