I'm feeling pretty depressed

[mvd]

This is my DU family and I have no close friends or relatives so venting here. The real estate agent friend we had broke off contact when we didn’t use her for any house sale. At the time it was too much because we needed more help moving than she could give. Then we had that whole house buyer nightmare. Mom has this wonderful lawyer and she’s like a friend but lives a ways away and has her own career and family. The new real estate agent is nice, but she doesn’t come over like the friend real estate agent did. We have to move by September according to mom’s lawyer. Hope to make some money. Until then it’s a horrible month financially for mom and me. I’m not asking DU for more money but it’s just so depressing right now. At least politics is looking better. Hope everyone else is doing ok.

[Stuart G]

1. Good Luck with The Move...We Will Support You Here at Democratic Underground...no text...

[mvd]

2. Thank you! House is going up for sale very soon

These past few years I have gone through have been very draining. This house is too big for mom and the new start is finally coming.

[debm55]

3. Please remember Matt you are part of the family here. I wish you all the joy and happiness. It is okay to feel overwhelm

with you and your mom"s situation. I felt very depressed the other day. I find it helps to keep a journal and let it all out. And to come here also.Please be well. Love. Debbie. PS Look to the future in your life's journey. It will come.

[mvd]

4. Thanks so much Deb

How is Rich doing? I always have you and Rich in my thoughts.

[MLAA]

5. Sending good vibes for a quick sale at a great price! Then on to your next life in a new place.

[PennRalphie]

6. You should get a very high sale price

Around here in Western PA, homes that sold in 2020 for 500,000 are now selling for 750,000 or more. It shouldn’t be any different in Eastern PA, in fact it should be better.

President Biden and Governor Shapiro have the PA economy booming. Everyone who wants a job has their choice of jobs. It’s never been a better time, in my lifetime, for employment.

There’s really not a reason that your mother’s home won’t sell very quickly, most likely with multiple offers.

Good luck with the sale.

[mdmc]

7. praying for blessings

good luck with the move

[mvd]

8. Little better today but might not last

We almost lost our TV. YouTube TV wouldn’t allow any payment flexibility. But Hulu with Live TV gave us a free month. I’ll stay with them after that. I am very stubborn about not asking DU for more. Any ideas would be appreciated because it’s a 5 week Social Security on top of everything.

[XanaDUer2]

9. Have you yet explored

Contacting the PA dept of vocational rehab for disabled job-training and placement? They furnish you with free assistive devices, including hearing aids. The Dept of Vocational Rehab does everything to get ppl gainful employment.

[Hekate]

11. Seems your answer is below

[PennRalphie]

12. In my lifetime,

Last edited Sat Aug 3, 2024, 11:21 PM - Edit history (1)

There’s never been a better time to find a job. Everyone who wants to work usually has their choice of jobs. You’ve given him some fantastic suggestions, but for some reason, no follow up.

One of my daughter in laws friends recently started working, at home, for a national drug store chain as customer service. Training was done via zoom. My daughter in law talks about it with a bit of envy. Working in your pajamas sounds better than battling traffic.

It’s a fantastic time for employment in PA. The economy here is simply fantastic. It’s also a great time to sell homes. So either way, he’ll be ok. With employment or the sale of the home.

[Hekate]

16. All good suggestions

We shall see what comes of it this time

[XanaDUer2]

17. There's never any followup

He's had DUers helping him for years.

If it had been pursued several years ago, he would probably be in a wfh job full-time job with a regular, decent paycheck.

It is disturbing to hear a sick, elderly, frail (from when he put up her picture many fundraisers ago) person has fallen and is not being checked out medically. I thought there was a social worker?

[PennRalphie]

18. I just looked at that website.

https://www.dli.pa.gov/Individuals/Disability-Services/ovr/Pages/default.aspx

That website is an absolute treasure trove of information. They help with job placement, transportation, housing for training and just about everything for those needing it.

Xana, thank you for pointing out that state department for mvd. He doesn’t need to travel anywhere. You contact and apply online. This is truly fantastic news for mvd.

Mvd, this website Xana found for you might be the answer to the beginning of the end of your struggle. The state is there to help you. I’m surprised the social worker didn’t steer you there, but that doesn’t matter now. You know where to get help! In a couple of hours, you would be connected to someone in the state whose job is to help people just like you.

This is a perfect example of helping people in need. Thank you, Xana, for finding that help.

[XanaDUer2]

19. I told him this on a past fundraiser

Ignored, of course. Tree Hugger basically drew him a roadmap of every single service (including transportation) he has at his and his mother's disposal.

I hope these stories are untrue. A few weeks ago, she was sleeping on the floor with a deflating mattress under her. I'm disabled and worked full-time for years. He could easily have help getting a job to afford TV (!)..

Then she never has enough food. What is going on? Do any of these friends floating in and out not have questios about this lady's living conditions?

[PennRalphie]

20. Well, I'm kinda speechless

I really do hope, for his and especially his mother’s sake, that these stories are all made up. Because, if they are true, it’s a real failure on the part of friends, family, social workers, doctors, hospitals, and many others.

I’ll leave it at that. I do notice a trend of never responding to genuine offers of help, unless it’s cash. Then, admonition from enablers.

I wish mvd and especially his mother well.

[Hekate]

25. I may not be the only one who wonders if "mother" even really exists

[bluestarone]

21. YOU, have assisted this person with all excellent info, in the past!

I'm sure most people here know what this person will do NEXT. This site has VERY caring people that will do anything to help a person out. SHAME, SHAME on those that will abuse this great option. We'll wait and see how this moves ahead. TY to all that TRIED to assist this person to get the help he actually NEEDS!

[XanaDUer2]

22. OMG dozen or more DUers

Went to the mattresses to help this guy! Including over 10k in cash. It is never enough. I gave him money myself a few years ago. I could use that now, post-surgery worried about my bills, for food , not having TV. holy christ on a pogo stick. 211 alone opens a cornucopia of help. It is always, thank you, I'll think about that, but I need to meet the goal.

I used DVR they paid for everything and placed me in a job. All I had to do was try.

If this is true, I feel very sorry for his mother. She belongs someplace, being fed, having water and electricity, medical care if she falls (wow), in a normal bed.

[bluestarone]

23. I believe you 100% I also feel like you do about IF his mothers is getting the care she needs?

HE knows the system. SHAME SHAME! TYVM for all you do to help others here. Wish there was a way to warn people here of this, without them getting upset at the warnings. I won't bump this anymore. TY so much for the care you feel for others!

[XanaDUer2]

24. I was in social services for yrs

Proud to say helped many ppl, esp the last ten yrs. Thank you for recognizing that. There are a lot of lowly-paid unsung heroes.

Soooo, Mother fell, hurt her wrist, and her body now hurts. But, tough noogs on her bc there's no Uber money. This is demented. In the 70s, when my elderly grandfather fell, my mother called ambulances and stayed home and follow-uped via phone. What if her wrist is damaged? I feel like we have heard horror tales for yrs, like a slow-moving, horrific trainwreck, in front of our faces.

Or maybe it is just bullshit. I hope.

[mvd]

10. Also mom fell a couple days ago

Never a good thing especially at her age. Wrist and other things hurt.

[debm55]

13. I am so sorry for your mom.

[mvd]

14. Thanks Deb

I think she should be checked out at the ER to be safe. But the hospitals are 6-10 miles away and we don’t have the money to get back. DU has helped me get through these bad years but I do not want it to continue. That’s why I am just seeing what can be done.

[MerrilyMerrily]

30. Hello there

Hi mvd, I am new to posting but a longtime reader of DU threads, including yours. I once visited one of your Gofundme appeals and learned your full name. Knowing that, I was able to find your dad's obituary (I am so very sorry his illness took his life). From there I learned your address and discovered there is an urgent care clinic 1.7 miles (5 minutes' drive) from your home. It closes at 9 PM. I assume they would send her on to the hospital's ER, 3 miles further, if necessary.

Perhaps a neighbor would be so kind as to run your mom over to the cliinic? I do not know where your aunt and uncle and cousins (mentioned in the obituary) live, but maybe one of them would make a quick trip to help your mom.

Or perhaps your mom knows perfectly well there is an urgent care clinic nearby and doesn't think she needs to go? After all, you yourself just mentioned her injury as an afterthought, a day and-a-half after you started this thread and considerably later than detailed posts about real estate agents, Youtube TV, etc.

BTW, my budget does not accommodate cable, Hulu. or Youtube TV, but I am enjoying the selections offered for free on freevee, tubi, pluto, etc. Maybe they don't cover everything, but I really can use the $90/mo that Hulu charges for other things, like food and transportation.

I am glad to read you are determined not to ask for money any more. I hope I am mistaken, but you seem to be hinting that someone should offer without being asked, August being a 5-week Social Security month and all. As I said, I hope not! Good luck!

[XanaDUer2]

31. A 75(?)-yr-old frail woman

Falling and being in pain is the scenario for a broken hip (wrist). And, with that, issues can domino to, sorry, dying. It shouldn"t be an afterthought like, losing tv...mom fell.

My partner fell down the outside stairs, insisted he was fine. We went to our urgent care and guess what? Broken wrist. He was about 68 at the time. Thank God , ott, he was okay. It's serious.

[MerrilyMerrily]

32. I agree

If this happened "a couple of days" ago already and the wrist is hurting, it's past time to get her to urgent care. There are several ways to do that. I'm trying to refrain from saying everything I think about this situation.

[mvd]

33. She went to that Urgent Care

They think she should get checked out at the ER. I wish they would have done a little more than they did. I still miss my dad so much. I’m venting. Not asking. Some make me feel so bad for asking which also doesn’t help. I can’t control what others decide to do.

[XanaDUer2]

34. ER

Your mom falling and hurting herself is way more important than looking for free tv. I implore you, have her examined. Can you have her use an ambulance. Shes on Medicare. The patient advocate can arrange her transport home. Did urgent care share why they feel she needs the ER? Did they ,at least check her wrist?

[MerrilyMerrily]

36. No you can't

No you can't control what others decide to do. I've decided I don't believe you are telling the truth. Your story changes and doesn't hang together, and that has happened in past threads as well.

If any part of what you say about your mom's suffering is true, and you refuse to take her to the ER, you are not being responsible, and the consequences could be very serious. But - now I think you added this injured wrist story to your general "venting" about needing to get some money because your kindhearted friends were giving you great advice but hadn't taken the hint about paying your TV bill.

Well, I hope that's the case. That is, I hope you are adding fictional details for sympathy. If urgent care really told you that your mom needed to go the ER and you took her back home instead, that's neglect. Someone else needs to step in and make sure she will be okay.

[XanaDUer2]

38. I hope these yrs of deprivation stories are

Just sympathy-money-seeking, bc , if not, proceeds from the house and the mother's SS needs to go to getting her into a safe, stable, skilled-nursing facility. After all, it is her home. SS is meant for the needs of the recipient who earned it, not supporting refusing-to-work middle-aged children.

She almost fell down the stairs a few yrs ago during a broken-toilet fundraiser. No food, and no meals on wheels, and I think there's no social worker either. Or theyre blind and incompetent.

Now she fell, is still in pain, with no hospital visit. What the Hell is going on if this is all true? The broken airbed was horrifying. But, hey, he almost lost TV!!! maybe she fell hoisting herself off the floor.

[MerrilyMerrily]

39. Exactly!

[XanaDUer2]

40. Maybe it is a hint for more Uber money

To get mom to the ER.

[MerrilyMerrily]

42. Took long enough to mention it

[PennRalphie]

41. His history is not liking any facts.

He will most likely pretend to ignore you.

I feel bad for the mother. Mvd is employable. Everyone has told him where to go for help. Xana and others have posted pages of places to get help.

Now he’s depressed. Depression is a very very serious condition. It’s frustrating reading his posts, knowing the suggestions given will be ignored.

People are always more than willing to help others. Money isn’t always the answer, but many think what’s the harm throwing 20 or 25 dollars at a person who’s really in need. I suspect that’s what he counts on.

[MerrilyMerrily]

43. His mother needs help

IIRC, he's said he stays home with his mother because she suffers from depression (the actual psychological condition, not a case of the grumps because the August check has to last five weeks).

He's said a lot of things, though, and if they are real there is elder abuse going on. I think he does not hesitate to make up anything that might get him those contributions - but if his mother is going hungry and sleeping on the floor in a big house with broken plumbing and a son who won't take a bus, orders groceries via Instacart and takes Ubers to the dentist, but tells her she can't take an Uber to get her wrist treated - a wellness check on the poor lady is overdue.

[XanaDUer2]

44. In past fund-raisers

She was constantly visiting the ED due to stress and depression over money worries. Been there, live that. There were several fundraisers to alleviate that. Thats why him not getting a FT job and helping alleviate this ED-inducing stress flummoxes me. DVR WILL get him a WFH job so he can contribute to the household. Its weird

So, on top of my health and my own money worries, I now this month have to worry about whatever the Hell the 5-week SS check deposit is. I'll be going to the ED myself with stress.

[JoseBalow]

45. It is illegal to solicit funds under false pretenses

Fraud

[Hekate]

83. Is there a mother at all, is what I've been wondering for a long time

[PennRalphie]

47. Sigh.

I actually have experience with a broken wrist and urgent care. My wife and her friends were playing pickleball last year. Oh, it’s the new sport for those of us who think we can still play tennis, but really can’t. She came into the house in a panic, telling me her friend had fallen backwards playing pickleball and they weren’t sure if she was hurt or not. My wife and I took her to urgent care. ER’s are way too backed up for this kind of thing. We sat there for about an hour waiting on her. She came out in a cast. They had xrayed her arm and wrist to determine if there was a fracture. There was. A very small hairline fracture of the wrist. Urgent care put her wrist in a cast and suggested she follow up with an orthopedic doctor. She already had one, so she knew where to call. I suspect if she didn’t have an orthopedic doctor, they would have referred one. She followed up within a few weeks, the dr gave her a softer cast and she’s now fine. They’re all still playing pickleball, too.

What he’s telling us about urgent care is just not how it works. They don’t refuse to treat you and refer you to the ER. UNLESS it’s a very serious medical issue. If that’s what they told him, he calls 911 and mother’s Medicare pays for it.

It’s frustrating watching him post for whatever reason, and NEVER taking anyone up on their offer of help. He has many enablers here, who will say, if you don’t want to give him money, just move on. They’re correct. Nobody’s forcing anyone to give him money. I suspect those who do are extremely wealthy with a very good and generous heart. Nobody likes to see another person suffer. Nobody. In the past, he has bragged about a great friend here on DU that always comes through with a huge donation of cash. Hopefully, that friend is helping him to straighten out the situation he’s in.

I just know from the many charitable organizations I’ve dealt with, there are serious needs out there with the elderly and children, those suffering from mental illness and various addictions. Of course you want to help!

Tugging on heart strings about an elderly widow who is suffering affects everyone. Of course you want to help!

Wasn’t it recently about a root canal? One that would be fully covered by Medicaid, but he doesn’t like the dentist. Oh, and the Uber to get there.

So, the enablers protect him, understandable. He comes across as a very vulnerable individual, perhaps unable to make life decisions.

He has been given tons of ways to seek help for HIS situation. That state site referenced by Xana is an excellent resource for his depression. The state will help. So would 211 or his local state representative. Shapiro’s office would help. I would think his local Democratic committee office would help him navigate through it all.

I really wish him well. This depression he’s suffering is quite serious. With his mother going to the ER multiple times for depression, the family needs social worker type help quickly. Money for tv won’t fix it. I hope he takes advantage of it to get well.

[Hekate]

84. A lot of big-hearted givers at DU are on a very tight budget themselves

[osteopath6]

80. But

Urgent care would make her sign out AMA (against medical advice) if they felt she needed evaluated at an ER but PT declined the standard transport via EMS. This would result in her insurer (Medicare) refusing to pay for the entire visit...

It isn't.. "Oh yeah, she should be evaluated for this emergent condition. So, we'll go ahead and have the family transport via private vehicle."

More like.. "You need a higher level of care, an ambulance has been dispatched to transport you to the hospital and they will be arriving shortly."

[JoseBalow]

35. Reminds me of a section from "A Child's Garden of Grass"

Acquiring marijuana...
- - Receiving marijuana as a gift:

Look for people who are smoking grass
Go over and stand next to them as quietly as possible
And look wistful
If they give you any be sure to say thank you

[MerrilyMerrily]

37. Never heard of that one!

[debm55]

46. Excuse me for butting in. but why would you look up someone's private information, I can see other's point of view but

you seem overly invested in the Father's Obituary, Millage to clinics. and relatives. You only have 105 posts and have been here since 2023, I understand what you are saying but it is creepy to do a private search on death of his father, where he lives, relatives , etc. JMO

[MerrilyMerrily]

48. I suppose it is odd debm55

I have read mvd's threads over the years, and on one occasion I went to his GoFundMe, which gave his full name, which stuck in my head because I know someone with a very similar name. I also remembered many people trying to help him find resources in his home state, so I put the name and the state into Google and voila. From there, the obituary, which listed mvd, his mother, and other close family members came up. The address came from doing the same name + state for his mom. Google also told me the names of the hospitals near that address and how to get there. I didn't count the clicks, but I had all that info in five minutes or less.

Why did I take those easy steps to check out his story? Because during my years of lurking he has said many things that didn't ring true to me. I found his habit of ignoring any help except cash concerning. His occasional claims that he had already looked into this or that resource, and it wouldn't work for him, often came after it was clear more money wasn't coming from DU this time and the people hanging in with helping him were sticking with good advice only. That I found downright disturbing. I wondered if good people with limited budgets of their own were giving money to a man who was playing them.

I couldn't say so at the time because I was a lurker who was too chicken to sign up in general, and signing up just to say "I don't believe you" with post #1 was not appealing.

This time, I gave him a little advice like several other people. I tried not to sound harsh about the fact I had noticed he suddenly announced his mom hurt her wrist two days ago (and HE thought she should go to the ER) after more than a day of lamenting other things, such as Youtube TV not agreeing to reduced payments so he's switching to Hulu.

If he really believed the nearest hospitals were 6-10 miles away and he didn't have the money for an Uber to go that far, he would be glad to know there was an urgent care clinic five minutes away, so I told him. Even a casually-acquainted neighbor would run an injured elderly lady less than 2 miles up the road. Then and only then he announced that she had already gone to this clinic and the STAFF thought his mom should go to the ER. Which apparently didn't happen, as he still needs some cash for that Uber.

I couldn't help but notice that nearly every complaint he posted came with a concluding statement that he was not ASKING for money but Gee things are so bad. Hint hint. His response to my mentioning that was that he couldn't control what people decide. That's a Trump quality nondenial denial, right there.

We all go online to check hinky statements from politicians all the time. Sometimes a little Googling tells me they are actually telling the truth for a change, sometimes not. If someone I don't know personally is claiming one financial crisis after another, and kicking his thread over and over until he gets the money he wants, then yes, I will see if I can get a better sense of his credibility.

I'm sad that you find my low post count suspicious. I expect to post a dozen times, maybe more, in a thread that gets my spidey sense, or hackles, going. The rest of the time - I'll never make into the tens of thousands.

[debm55]

49. I understand what you and the other posters are saying and have on previous posts. However, my point was going into

someone's private information. My father died in September, and I don't think it is anyone's business to do a search on me, my relatives and my location. JMO. I don't like the idea. Maybe I am an old fart that just doesn't get it. I don't feel great about giving information out to my bank. I understand that his mother is the issue here. But It is a double edged sword knowing that now posters on a discussion forum or lurkers can find out my location. People don't always have our best interest at heart.

[PennRalphie]

50. Please given him the website

Debm, you seem to have a really good rapport with mvd. I’m seriously concerned about this depression of his.

Xana suggested that he look into https://www.dli.pa.gov/Individuals/Disability-Services/ovr/Pages/default.aspx

It seems that agency will help him find a job, housing if needed for training, transportation and training for a job if necessary.

A steady paycheck may go a long way into helping any anxiety he’s feeling.

Maybe suggest that to him privately. He really needs that type of help.

Maybe he’ll take your suggestion.

[debm55]

51. I will try. However my son who is 33 years old and adopted is now just getting help now on his own. I live in SW PA. And

I know of the programs offered=food stamps, Medicaid, Vocational training and a job. I explained to Matt. You can even use the computer to call in. But you have to want it. Pushing will not work. When my husband found out he had Malignant Cancer, son turned around and is getting counseling and training. I will email. him. Tomorrow is radiation day for my husband. I will do tomorrow night. I try to stay in the middle. I like Matt. and I feel for his mom. TY PennRalphie.

[PennRalphie]

52. I wish the best for your husband

I’ll keep both you and your husband in my thoughts.

[MerrilyMerrily]

54. I don't understand your point then

mvd put his name out there in a GoFundMe. Otherwise, I wouldn't know it. Several people have mentioned his state, not his location. I don't know your full name. If you have given your full name to some posters here, I assume you limited that to people you trust. However, those who DO know you that well might look up your father's obituary - to see if there is a tribute page where they can offer you words of comfort. What would be creepy about that?

You did go to my profile to find out what you could about me, right? Perfectly reasonable thing to do. People want to know who they're dealing with. Not just when they want money, but especially then.

And surely you can see that no one asking for money has the right to say, "But don't make sure I'm telling the truth - You don't know me but act now!!"

I don't know if you've seen PennRalphie's post above (the title is "Sigh&quot . His post below, asking you to consider talking to mvd privately about getting real help, completes the picture.

If YOU needed financial help temporarily, people here on DU who trust you to be telling the truth about your emergency would give happily. I imagine lots of people here trust you. You must see that someone who very frequently and very persistently asks for money, but gets tangled up in changing facts and dubious excuses, is a horse of a different color.

[debm55]

56. What I needed to see was right next to your name. the number of posts. I understand

the situation more then you think I do. As a teacher for 40 some years, tough love/words doesn't always work. TY The help and information given was great and much needed. But sometimes it may not reach the person if they in crisis.

[MerrilyMerrily]

59. "You only have 105 posts and have been here since 2023"

Where is 2023 next to my name?

People on DU are the only people you've ever known who might want to offer comfort and would try to find out how to do so? And you'd be creeped out if someone you've known IRL tried? You seem too kindhearted to believe that.

I never thought you did not understand the situation with mvd. You asked me why I checked out his latest story and I answered.

Good night, debm55.

[debm55]

60. I was told by an e-mail. Happy now?

[questionseverything]

91. Everyone's sign up date is in their profile

[debm55]

92. TY for sharing , I had the information shared to me via DU email I know to look at the profile, but was given the date

before. I have been here since 2004 , so I know how things work.

[questionseverything]

93. Merrily had asked, where was 2023 next to her name

[debm55]

95. It's not, it is in the profile. Look up my profile. I don't quit get what you are saying. My biggest question was not

about that, but about using a poster's Go Fund Me to track him down--dad's obit, relatives and address. on google. I would not want it done to me and I doubt you would want it done to you. The situation with matt's mom is very sad. However, no one should have their personal information be know to anyone on a forum. If you want you can prove me wrong. But that won't change my mind.If she/he has the address, it would be good to call the police for a wellness check. TY

[questionseverything]

97. I was answering merrily , they had asked where the 2023 was

I agree with you about it being creepy for them to be searching for his personal info

[debm55]

98. Thank you so much, I have so much with Rich's malignant prostrate cancer and the bank freezing our accounts and

the credit and debit cards. I paid for my new glasses with a frozen card. they said it was a computer problem at the bank. I could take the glasses as I have to wait until the bank sorts out the problem. I am very sorry I was snarky to you. It is not like me. Please accept my apology for any unkindness I have shown .

[questionseverything]

99. No worries, you are a very kind person, I knew it was just a misunderstanding

😉❤️

[debm55]

57. They offered their words of comfort to me, here in the Lounge. And for that I am forever grateful from the bottom of my

Last edited Sun Aug 4, 2024, 11:25 PM - Edit history (1)

heart. In fact, I bookmarked it. I have friends I write emails to and one who sent me a ton of cards to my husband and I, When we found out my husband has malignant cancer, What she did was kind, what you did was creepy. JMO

[mvd]

53. This obsession of yours is really weird

I am not letting these posts get me further down. You don’t know me at all and act like you do. No more responses from me to you. Just this one.

[debm55]

55. Matt, turn the computer off, take a look at your mom and talk to her for awhile. See if she needs anthing. I suffer from

depression and anxiety because of my family. Make a note to yourself to take your mom to the ER tomorrow. You need to be strong for your mom. I will email you tomorrow. Play some music sit on the porch and relax. Or simply go to sleep. You need to keep your strength up so you can care for your mom. AND take care of yourself. Youtube, has channels of music to relax by. Use it. I do. If you live near a Senior Center call them or a church they have members that will drive you to appointments. You don't have to be a member. Use them. Remember there are those here that want to help you. You are loved Matt. and people want to help. Sometimes tough love doesn't always work. But you do need to take care of Mom. I know you have it in you. Call a church or center tomorrow. Right now relax and get a good night's sleep so you can do what you know in your heart you have to do. One day at a time. Love, Deb.

[demmiblue]

94. "You only have 105 posts and have been here since 2023..."

Naw, many of us know exactly who this is.

The complete obsession is creepy af.

[debm55]

96. I believe or think I know the poster too. I had a constant go around with a very similiar poster. If said poster has

address of Matt. It would be a great service to notify Social Services in the area. I do not have it, and will not do a google for it. I will contact Matt this evening about his mom. As for me , I am tired and will go out and watch the black skimmers. in my neighbors pond.

[PennRalphie]

15. Wow. Sorry about your mother

Because she’s older, falls can be very, very dangerous. Doesn’t Medicare pay for an ambulance? She could call an ambulance to take her to the hospital, you could stay home and communicate by phone. Then, you would only need transport one way and only for your mother. If she did t have a ride available, the hospital’s social worker would find her a ride home.

It would be very imperative to have your mother checked as soon as possible.

[LiberalLoner]

26. Hoping so much things will work out very well, and that better times lie ahead for you.

We are here for you…please post anytime we can help.

[viva la]

27. I hope things are better in the fall!

For you AND the nation.
Sorry about the realtor friend.

I had a friend who was a stockbroker, and I let him invest this little inheritance I got. Then I moved the $ to an IRA, and didn't do any more business with him (because I didn't have any more money). And suddenly he was never available to talk or hang out.

Real professionals do not take offense when friends don't do business with them!
I'm sorry she treated you like that. It's neither friendly NOR professional of her.

[mvd]

28. That realtor friend went full MAGA anyway

Maybe in the end it is better she is out of our lives. Thanks so much everyone. It is great to have a place to turn to.

[XanaDUer2]

29. Please have your mother's wrist examined

And tell medical personnel she fell. She could have a hairline fracture.

[InAbLuEsTaTe]

58. Hope all goes well for you!!

[XanaDUer2]

61. Is your mom being examined for wrist/body pain?

I'm sorry she had to go another day in pain. DUers are worried about her. Hopefully, you got up early and got onto helping her today first thing.

[Floyd R. Turbo]

62. 🦗🦗🦗🦗

[XanaDUer2]

64. I know

Hope its just another sympathy-sop for cash. Btw, he's fine Ubering around to his own dental appmnts, which he also uses as funding requests for years, but he has Medicaid. If she's really in pain, there's no Uber money, so take a Tylenol and walk it off old lady

[Floyd R. Turbo]

66. Oh oh! Out of Tylenol! Time for a fund raiser!

[XanaDUer2]

67. If true, all these stories

Its horrifying. Imagine if this was a child? Doesnt his mom have a right to prompt, appropriate medical care?

[debm55]

65. I DU last night to tell him to use Senior Centers or Church organizations for rides.

[XanaDUer2]

68. I begged him yrs ago, as did other concerned

DUers, to do that as well. A social worker in his county gave him the name of the free medical-ride service for the elderly and Medicaid patients. No expensive Ubers required. We rely on similar here. The social worker handled it for us, since we're disabled.

Sometimes you do have to wait. The ride is $1 two ways, with one free person assisting the disabled or elderly person. They also take ppl to groceries.

[debm55]

69. That's what we have in our PA county. But some(Westmoreland) will only let the person with the appointment go, based on

my mother who isn't truthful.

[XanaDUer2]

70. Ok

He's have several fund raisers for Ubers, when he doesn't have to use ride-share services.

Saying he can't bring his mother for proper care bc there's no travel money is crappola. This could have been arranged several years ago. Again, I hope there would be an uproar if a child was being subjected to this treatment.

If true, his mom has rights too, and not lose sight of HER. She went yet another day, yesterday, probably in pain. If my adult child told me there was no travel money, and I had fallen in pain, Id be so pissed I'd call 911 myself to get checked, bypassing him entirely. DVR is 100% guaranteed FT job to help bring money into the household, lessening her ED visits due to stress. That was another fund raiser.

[debm55]

71. I understand you completely. My family will not take Access as it is for poor folks. So last summer it was me and my

my husband picking them up in Westmoreland and driving them to all the appointments. Some people are set in their ways. I too, if I was in pain would call myself, but we don't know the family dynamics in play. .

[XanaDUer2]

72. Its obvious what the right thing to do here

Fallen older mother in pain. The only logical dynamic is getting her help..my first thought would be potential fractured wrist/hip.

If she cannot get basic home care, then she needs to be where she can get it. And you're losing TV? who cares?

[debm55]

73. I understand completely. I called Senior Services in Allegheny County for my dad. I thought it was elder abuse. Their

house straddles the Allegheny/Westmoreland line. They would not do anything. I wonder why his mother does not do anything. All it takes is a call.And the county will take care of it. Is she bedridden as my father was.? Lying in his own feces? He never made a call. but never did my mother and brother and sister that live their. Like I said it was too beneath them to ask for help. Perhaps that is what is going on. I don't know.

[XanaDUer2]

76. I do think of this stranger from time to time

Or, she's fine, watching tv kicked back in a recliner enjoying a glass or wine, blissfully unaware of all this fundraising craziness. I hope.

[Harker]

101. After the latest "go fund me" event here at DU...

within a couple days this poster was mentioning having just made monetary political donations.

Stunning.

[XanaDUer2]

102. !

!!

[PennRalphie]

104. What!!!!!

Good people are giving him money for a cause for his mother and he’s turning around and donating it?

There isn’t a Democrat anywhere who would want money from a depressed man who’s having trouble caring for his hungry mother!

Plus if he had money for a political donation, why is he asking for money?

Perplexing.

[Harker]

105. I had remained unsure, though skeptical, but that clinched it.

Even though the stated amounts weren't much, it just doesn't add up in my view.

It's sad in many ways.

[XanaDUer2]

106. Good question. Nt

[Raven]

74. Are we sure the mother actually exists?

[XanaDUer2]

75. No

Couple of years ago he posted a picture of a frail, elderly-looking ( she looked awful frankly) woman , masked (!), holding a 'bill' you couldn't see.

So, who knows.

[Raven]

77. Is it possible to get a welfare check on the mother? I know we got that for another DUer recently.

[XanaDUer2]

78. Sadly, I don't know

Over the last few years, it's been she's sleeping on a deflating air mattress; food scarcity ( those fundraising threads got crazy); fell down the stairs; no Uber money; frequent ED visits due to money stressors; utilities threatened with cutting off.

I have no idea how to even approach that.

[Raven]

79. The Moderators might know. I have no idea how to flag them on this.

[PennRalphie]

81. Your seem to know him personally

It might be good to contact him and privately ask to communicate with the mother, to see what she needs. If DU heard from you that his mother needs X, Y, Z, I have a feeling everyone would jump to help.

[debm55]

82. No I don't know personally. I live in Allegheny county and I don't know what county he is in. I do Du emails. mostly

when things have come up. No phone number. I told him what to do today and I hope he took my advice. I told him I would DU mail tonight to see how things are going. I will let you know. if mom needs help.

[PennRalphie]

85. My mistake, I thought you knew him

Hopefully, he’s contacting the department that will help find him a job today.

[XanaDUer2]

86. After getting his mother looked at medically

Then he can hop right on to hooking up with DVR, 100% guaranteed FT job, WFH, easing these stressful , constant money problems.

Then, I hope he catches us up on mom's potential injuries.

[debm55]

87. Oh no, I told him to contact a church or senior center to take his mom to the ER. I hope he did it. His mom needs to

come first and then the training and job. Penn Ralphie where in PA do you live.?

[PennRalphie]

88. Western PA

I know you’ve asked me a few other times. I live north of Pittsburgh. Closer to Butler than the Burgh.

[debm55]

89. Sorry. I forgot.

[PennRalphie]

90. Not a problem

I’m not a decades long thousands of post member. I’m easily forgotten. It’s better that way.

[Floyd R. Turbo]

100. I'm hopeful that someone here has or can find out where you live and will request that law enforcement

perform a wellness check on your mother.