This is a post response to milestogo

[JMCKUSICK]

And their post
There is going to be a rise in suicides.

I've really struggled between staying hopeful and optimistic about my triple bypass coming up on Friday.
What I'm struggling with is what is my quality of life going to be coming out of surgery. I'm not talking about surgical complications, I'm talking about things out of my control like my chronic back pain that's only gotten worse these last three years despite four surgeries. I'm talking about swimming against an impossible current trying to get SSDI, I'm talking about being really alone here, yes I have some friends and I'm in touch with my two sisters, but they are all far away and the only real intimacy that I can rely on is from my family here.
I'm deathly afraid of what is happening to millions, FUCKING MILLIONS, of our friends, relatives, co-workers, and perfect strangers as we all once were.
I'm going to the protest tomorrow in Springfield Illinois to voice my fears, but if I'm entirely honest, it's also to get out of the house no matter what the cost.
If you see a guy with a sign saying " Is this what your parents and grandparents fought and died for"?
Part of me wonders if it would be best if I didn't wake up and as I tear up with the sadness I feel, I only pray that whatever Higher Power is with me, do what is best.
I feel the exact same emotions that I felt over and over again as I got moved to another home, another foster home, another family that I couldn't bond with.
I'm scared that I have no "real" value in today's society. I'm scared knowing I'm about two or three months from possible homelessness because they will take everything away from people like us.
I'm scared the same way a small child is when she is truly frightened by something traumatic that he witnessed or experienced.
I don't feel secure. You all have given me what hope I have and I'm really grateful to you for it.
The difference between an inspired me and a hopeless me is greater than the height and depth of the Grand Canyon. The trips between the two poles is usually quite painful as inspiration brings vulnerability and emotional engagement while despondence brings self isolation and descents into self pity, self defeat and many thoughts of why bother.
Even this post defines the yoyo of emotional place I go daily.
There are many people much closer than I, I'm a coward.
We all need help! Help means:
Outreach
Listening
Relating
Understanding
Affirmation
Support
Guidance
Directions
Encouragement
Purpose
Love
I could go on, but please know that it's way more important to be with us where we are versus asking us to come join you where you are. That's the thing about trust and intimacy, how can I go where you think I should if you're not willing to meet me where I am.
I'm not asking you to reach out to me, I. Asking you to reach those that you know are in need, mostly emotional and spiritual needs and yes, sometimes financial. I did not enclose my GFM link because this is not a plea, this is an explanation.
I'm mostly singing to the choir here, but I write this hoping that you can find a way to understand that all of us travel a spectrum of emotional experiences based on our lives. If you know someone had it rough, be prepared to find them in that rough place from time to time.
I will close with one of my Words that I try and live by.
It is from The AA big book.

And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me. I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
I write this post with love, vulnerability, hope and despair. Thanks for listening.
I love you DUers you've already saved my life a couple of times.

[Deuxcents]

1. ((😘))

[JMCKUSICK]

2. I can't find what that emoji means lol

[LuckyCharms]

4. It's a hug and kiss.

[JMCKUSICK]

5. That's so very sweet of you LuckyCharms

Thank you

[red dog 1]

3. First of all, good luck with your surgery on Friday,

I hope and pray all goes well and that after the surgery you feel much better.

I would add to your "We all need help! Help means" list
Prayer.
Prayers are powerful!
As you recuperate from your surgery, perhaps you could somehow get hold of one of Dr. Larry Dossey's books on the power of prayer.
He's a Texas M.D. who served as a battalion surgeon in Vietnam and later was Chief of Staff at Medical City Dallas Hospital.
His many books include his 1989 book: "Healing Words: The Power of Prayer and the Practice of Medicine"
If you Google this book and go to Amazon.com, you can read the Introduction and the first 18 pages of this book for free, (as well as the first few pages of his other books)
Click on "Read Sample"

Another doctor named Bernie Siegel, a retired pediatric surgeon, has also written many books you might want to read, including his 1988 best-seller, "Love, Medicine and Miracles"
You can also go to Amazon.com to read the first 18 pages of this book for free as well, including the complete Appendix, which includes a 7- page relaxation exercise, which I think you'll like.

I hope this helps.

Good luck on Friday; I'll be praying for you.

[markie]

6. ....

will always listen

[Hekate]

7. Best of luck with your surgery. Now is the time to think only of your own health & healing....

🌺 Think peace, think peace, be peace. 🌺

[cksmithy]

8. I feel what you are saying and agree with you too.

Take care, I hope Friday goes well for you.

[BaronChocula]

9. This will help me

Keeping you in my thoughts as you move through these difficulties.

[Cirsium]

10. Amen

"It's way more important to be with us where we are versus asking us to come join you where you are."

Well said, and very important.

That wisdom not only applies in our personal interactions, but in the political crisis as well.

[milestogo]

11. I'm glad you are talking about it.

Keep posting, we are here for you.

Big warm hugs.

[slightlv]

12. Thank you for your entire message... but especially this:

important to be with us where we are versus asking us to come join you

I have felt this SO many times since I was pushed out of my job because of my disabilities. And after the ups and downs life has dealt my little family over the last few years. But I have always felt so selfish for feeling it. The clothes I have are what I have to wear... no matter where I go. For the most part, the slacks should have been retired years ago after I dropped over 100 pounds. But, I wear them around the house because I only have one or two pair that fit me well enough to go to the grocery store, etc.

I have a friend around the corner and up the block, who's only been in my home when we first moved in and then again for the reception after we buried my mom a couple of weeks ago. I know it's a hassle for her; she's got much the same disabilities as I do; but she texts me come up there and it's only lately I've said "no" because I've been too much in pain, both physically and mentally, to do it.

I also remember what it was like when Mom was in her home, and I'd go by every night after work and spend a couple of hours fixing her supper and talking with her. I dearly wish some of my coworkers I counted as friend would come by even long enough to say "hi". But I don't say anything because again, I feel like it's just selfishness on my part. And, without a Real ID, I can't get on Post, myself.

And one last thing... I think there are thousands, if not millions, of us who are righteously experiencing PTSD because of trump and musk. I believe this SO strongly, that I can't believe no one has approached any of us to file a class action law suit against him. But when you wake yourself screaming out of nightmares and his face is the last thing you remember from it, no one can tell me that's NOT PTSD.

You're not alone... you're just isolated in your own habitat. But when I have felt my worst... sometimes in the early morning hours... I come here to DU, and there's always someone to give me a virtual hug. And for me, for just a few minutes, it puts a smile on my face and lightens my load a little. Through your fears and pain, let us do the same for you....

Hugs and Brightest Blessings.

[debm55]

13. kick