Questioning

[Tink41]

I've been in the questioning space for years. It started after my husband came out and we divorced. I have no recollection of sexual attraction to a woman. I am visually attracted to men, but I've never not once in 50+ years thought of sexual things w them. The best way to describe it is I view attractive men like a Teen Beat photo. Maybe I'd like to kiss them and they are awfully pretty but as soon as they show interest I run. I don't even know where to start. I just know it seems my whole life has been spent worrying if men like me as opposed to if I even like them. I loved my ex husband, he was perfect for me, but I suspect it was the things that made him different than a straight guy that I was attracted to. And I long for that. How does one go about figuring this out? Are there counselors that specialize in this?

[abqtommy]

1. The best results I've had in delving into my motives and behaviors has been by keeping a

Last edited Thu Jul 2, 2020, 05:26 AM - Edit history (1)

diary/journal. I write longhand with pen and paper and explore every nuance. Sure, there are counselors and therapists and some of them are very productive but nobody knows you like YOU and
you can save a lot of money going the diary/journal route...

[safeinOhio]

2. After my first split, I saw a

very wise shrink that tricked me into going back to school in my 40s and getting a degree in Psychology. Very smart man that I now feel I owe him my life.

Best of luck to you on your journey.

[PoindexterOglethorpe]

3. The only thing I can offer is that

sexuality is complicated.

Speaking as a very heterosexual woman, I am also very aware that sexuality, sexual identification, and all that is absolutely on a continuum. Not very many of us are at the extreme ends.

I'm going to guess there are counselors out there who specialize in this, although it might take a lot of research to find one. I sincerely wish you good luck.