RUNNING AWAY

[tomkoop]

Heading on down the line to bigger and better things is always the dream of an addict while sucking on a jug, sticking a needle in their fucking arm or poppin some of those mothers little helpers.

IT DON'T HAPPEN!!!

[NMDemDist2]

1. no matter where you go...

there you are. you can't run from yourself eh?

[Old Codger]

2. Geographicals

Never ever work.....

[tavalon]

3. Actually, I must disagree

Many, many years ago, I used a geographical to get away from my drug of choice. My drug of choice was a man called J. Now, a geographical alone, I can agree doesn't work. But that one was a pivotal part of my healing. As well, I hear so much about relapse when an addict goes back to the friend set they had before rehab, I can't help but think a change of scenery might help, not as a full cure, but as a chance to try something different.

My current relapse was as a result of letting my other partner from that time back into my life. Now granted, he wasn't an addict when I was with him, lo those 16 or so years ago, but I'm fairly convinced at this juncture that I'm the only Avalon I want in my life. I prefer that all my exes remain in Texas.

Wow, I just made it sound like it was the addict's fault that I fell. That isn't what I meant. I fell because I wasn't standing on solid ground anyway. He just helped make that abundantly clear. And thank goodness for that, because the 6 months of recovery I have under my belt are helping me as I face being the spouse of a person with cancer. I don't think I could do that without the 12 steps and the work I've already done.

Heck, I'm barely doing it. I'm down to an hour at a time. Forget one day at a time. Too long.

[Old Codger]

4. OK

I see exactly what you mean, but take the whole thing to what it actually means, when AA members refer to a "geographical" they are referring to running away from problems that are their own fault, not something that someone else is causing. Even though you were in fact somewhat to blame you could leave that problem behind and not take it with you. Whereas an addict is the problem in and of themselves so they are not leaving the problem behind but taking it with them... so in the case you refer to , yes that would work ok unless you end up tied up with someone new who was mostly like the one you left behind...

[tavalon]

5. Whoops, didn't know the terminology

And oh, howdy, did you ever pinpoint the hazard!

Based on what you say here, I can wholeheartedly stand by "geographicals don't work". Luckily, in the case I spoke of, I did the smart thing. Stayed unattached for quite a long time. And learned about the types I needed to avoid, and who they represented within my family of origin and did the work, work, work. And while the person in question inadvertently messed with me, I was fully responsible for my behavior. I don't think I was somewhat to blame, I believe it was fully my problem.

So, yeah, distance was my Curad, while I worked on the cure. (Hah, I've never been able to use Curad in a sentence. Where is my residual?)

As an interesting aside, I've always thought I carried the "addiction" gene, but I'm not so sure now. I tried with all my heart in the last seven weeks to find a numbing drug and I couldn't do it. Each time I came up for air, I was gut punched yet again. Now, admittedly, it wasn't an exhaustive search but it was exhausting. And I'm done with it. Facing the problem, the terror, once a day is quite enough.

[Old Codger]

6. Alright :)

You are on top of it for sure... recognizing the problem and recognizing the solution. Your idea of a geographical is definitely ok, I too used that solution once...

P.S. Good to see that you are still fighting the good fight, hang in there.