My father is 91.

[no_hypocrisy]

I have been through a lot in the past week.

He decided to drive by himself from NJ to FL a week ago Sunday.

Except he drove during the epic ice/snow storm last week.

No call. Not to me, to my sister, or my brother. We were worried.

He took a cell phone but has no voicemail and didn't pick up.

Then we got 4 calls from his credit card companies, claiming "unauthorized use" of the cards.

What would you think?

So today was Day Eight and no call.

I'm at his house and it's 6 pm. I hear the security alarm for the front door go off. I'm alone, panic, and run to see what it is.

My dad. Home from his roadtrip. Again, no call. I thought he was going to be gone until April.

He was off the radar for more than a week. I was ready to put out a missing persons call with the police.

He's in his Barka Lounger now, watching FOX, and the heat is up to 85 degrees now. Jesus. Well, I can't complain. I know where he is and he's fine.

[elleng]

1. Glad he's home and safe.

Should he be driving? Is he suffering from dementia? (Are YOU suffering from his dementia?)

Best wishes.

[no_hypocrisy]

3. No, he shouldn't even be driving down the street to get milk.

My siblings and I have this joke: we'd take away his keys but he'd go out and buy another car.

He's a stubborn old cuss, that's all.

As for the senility, don't know. No diagnosis and he'll never agree to an evaluation. And he may not even be senile really, just suffering from really bad judgment and stubbornness.

[elleng]

4. Does he see a physician?

My father, who passed at 98, saw a physician regularly (few times a year.) So do I.

Not talking about 'senility,' but dementia, which is on the 'spectrum,' but not senility.

[no_hypocrisy]

5. He has a PC MD but I don't think he sees him regularly.

Dad's a retired doctor himself and self-prescribes and I'm certain that he doesn't tell his PC about the other drugs. Meanwhile, the PC renews his other prescriptions.

And I'm certain Dad hasn't seen an ophthalmologist (eye doctor) in a long time. He uses those $6 glasses from the drugstore (magnifying glasses with a noserest). My guess is that if the eye doctor thinks that his vision prevents safe driving, he has to report that to the Division of Motor Vehicles and Dad will lose his license.

Another way Dad avoids being mentally evaluated is to evade his doctor.

[marybourg]

2. You'll smile at this someday. (Except for the FOX part).

[grasswire]

6. you can get the DMV to restrict his driving privileges

It's important to think about the lives he might take if he hits someone else. And that's a real possibility.