About a dog...

[Star-Thrower]

Hey my pal,
I can no longer see the sun nor feel it upon me.

I am now in the deep winter of my life.
My eyes, though not blind, now see dimly.
And yes, my hearing was gone long ago.
Yet even with my senses failing
I feel your sobbing by my side.

Do not be sad. Be like the sun at midday. *

I have little play left in me and our times of that
are but a dim memory. Sometimes it comes to me and
I remember and tug the war. And nudge the ball coming
towards me. Half-heartedly I try to catch it.
But i am weary now and the tricks and toys
are old.

I am old.

The path is narrowing.This earthly journey is coming to an end.
Years ago when I was young and strong and untiring you sat with me
on our bed. You told me a story, a tale, a dog’s tale. You said
"One day I will call you and you will not come."

You were serious and I would not listen.You said
"one day I will call tasha, tasha, where are you?
where is my tasha?"

And you called and called but I would not come.
and with much seriousness you said, "one day
you will go on without me. you will journey
on without me."

I am nearly ready to begin that journey.

You had tears in your eyes way back when.
For you knew that this was truth. But I in my
youthfullness bounded off the bed. The moment
of sentimentality had passed. The tears were dried
and licked away. Young and strong
it was time to play.

We went on to new adventures together. I never
gave it another thought., I was successful
in getting you to forget that dog tale.

But i am weary now. Tired, oh so tired,
I sleep the hours away. I am neither here nor there.
Drifting from now to then or when? Or where?
Sometimes I think i’m ready.

Am I ready to journey on ahead without you? You who
have always been by my side?

I could go quietly into that dark night. but I thrash
and struggle and this earthly plane with its grip
of chain holds and binds me.

The sun is now sinking into the earth.
And this dusk is the beginning
of the darkening of the light. *

Be not sad. be like the sun at midday. *

I ask you to remember that dog tale,
please, I pray, for I am drawn to you to stay.

Release me now from earth I pray, my journey has
started, I cannot stay.

Good-bye my pal, some day I’ll see you soon
Some time some way. my purpose in life was to give you my all
and when you call tasha i will come when you call.

--tasha1986-2003 * From the I Ching https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Ching

[Karadeniz]

1. Gut wrenching. I wrote a poem after the death of my Maltese. He'd moved with us to Europe and

Went all over with us. After moving to England, he traveled all over with us again. Then we all moved to Hawaii, then to Austin where his spleen ruptured and he was gone. I cried for a month. I only stopped when I finished a photo album of him in all the places we'd taken him. Then I could see all the love he'd had for 16 years and that he'd had a full, happy life. Then I felt better. The life he'd had made me happier than my loss.

In the poem, I described all the doors he'd waited at for me, knowing I'd come through whatever door for him. Then one day, he went through a door. But...he didn't wait for me.

[Star-Thrower]

7. Dogs seem to have

inner clocks. They know when you leave and they know when we return. Another dog I had died. Moxie, a Chihuahua in one morning had a great time retrieving her ball, back and forth. I was on my bed and on my laptop. Behind my house dogs were barking. I heard a horrible dog cry that I thougt was coming from there. I cut the sound and saw Mox girl's eyes vacant. Christ, I gathered her up, laid her on her back and tried to administer dog CPR., to no avail. She was gone. I called my vet and he said it could have been an aneurysm or a masive heart attack. I looked into the internet about sudden deaths in dogs. So many folks had similar stories with no hope to find out what happend.

[Karadeniz]

9. If I had a choice, I'd want warning, time to prepare (impossible), time to say goodbye.

[CommonHumanity]

2. too sad

I know that what you've posted is poignant beautiful and true, but I don't want to hear it. Too too sad. Since I got my beautiful girl I've dreaded the time she would weaken and grow old. I can barely stand to think of it. Some might say I am in denial. Perhaps I am, but I know that time will come and I will deal with it when it does. Until then, it is just TOO SAD to think about. So I will cross that bridge when that day comes.

[Star-Thrower]

8. Well, think of it this way,

we will on the most part, out live our dogs and and our cats. I know it is painfull to think of that. But we must think of the worst. Do you have a plan if you, god forgive, you die and leave behind your beloved furr baby? Think about it.

[CommonHumanity]

12. I do havea plan. Thanks for mentioning _NT

[Bayard]

3. Ah..... boy

So many painful memories here of the passing of many kiddos. Then, I remember the joyous times, and the love they brought to my life.

So gut wrenching that their lives are so much shorter than ours.

[Duppers]

4. Especially if the dogs were angels.

[lillypaddle]

5. Wow

You can feel the connection, so strong and deep. Beautiful.

[Harker]

6. I don't tear up often.

Maybe I should.

Thanks.

[Star-Thrower]

10. When tasha was declining

I joined a Yahoo group about senior dogs. Don't know if it still exists. Anyway they gave ways to help our senior dogs. Like rolling up a towel to be placed around the belly to help going down steps to do their "business". Then there was also using baby diapers.

I would lay on the floor and feed tasha vanilla ice cream.
As tasha declined (I at the time worked at a facility for psychologicaly troubled adolescents on the overnight shift), I would leave for work, and lay down a shower curtin for tasha and her baby diapers. In the morning I would gather up the sheets and launder them.

Then one morning as I returned from work, I gathred up tasha, placed her on my bed and prepared to launder the sheets on the floor. Then, out of the blue, tasha sat up on the bed and her eyes were vacant. I knew it was time. I freaking knew it. I called my vet and took tash in. It was heart renching, but I stayed as he injected the fatel shot. I stayed for a while with tash.

I still have her cremains today, thinking to either scatter her remains in the Lake Ontarior that she loved to swim in or scatter them in The Mount Hope Cemetory in Rochester, NY.

[In_The_Wind]

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