Soul Mate- What is the best definition?

[kimmerspixelated]

Sometimes I think I know, other times I'm not so sure.

Does a soul mate hurt you emotionally?

Are they just meant to challenge you, but nurture, too?

Of course, I know they aren't just the rose-colored perfect mates, it's more layered than that.

Also, do you have more than one?

What are your experiences?

[get the red out]

1. Member of your soul group

I have read that and it always resonated with me. I think there is more than one for each of us and how we interact depends on lessons and circumstances in this life. Just my 2 cents😏.

I have woken up in the night when my husband was coming to bed and had trouble recognizing him on a number of occasions. I see him playing a different role in my life for a half asleep second and wonder why this person is getting in bed with me. I really feel this is because we have had different roles in previous lives together.

[kimmerspixelated]

2. Soul mates and soul groups...

Someone told me that my father was the same father from another life.

[Kookaburra]

5. Interesting experience I had

When my older brother was dying in the hospital, it was the wee hours of the morning, and I was alone with him holding his hand. He had already slipped into a coma, so I wasn't sure if he could hear me or not, but anyway, I suddenly had a vision or possibly a dream of the two of us as sisters, and the roles were changed -- I was the sick one and he (she) was caring for me in a hospital (although this looked more like a mental facility). The feeling I got from the dream was that we were extremely religious, and I couldn't handle the fact that I was psychic, and had let everyone convince me I was insane. This soul was the only one who understood I was not crazy, and devoted her (his) life to caring for me.

Also, in a past life regression I saw myself as a young child, and the soul who is my younger brother in this lifetime was my father in that lifetime. I died quite young (5 or 6) from asthma, and he was inconsolable over it. Here's the thing, though, he was my adoptive father, which makes me believe that we end up together whether we start out that way or not.

My point is, the concept of soul groups with whom we play out these 3D dramas feels right to me. It also explains why we recognize people we've only met for the first time.

[Sweet Freedom]

3. This might be helpful...

It's been a while since I watched it.

&list=PL709E96474C76C3E4&index=2

[Matariki]

6. I must be getting old

I have a hard time taking spiritual advice from an 18 yr old very seriously, lol.

[Matariki]

4. I think it's usually a projection of one's anima/animus.

And since it's a projection, it doesn't usually work out well relationship-wise.

[piscesgurl]

7. Soul Mate

A true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. A soul mate's purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so out of control that you have to transform your life. <3
E.Gilbert

[kimmerspixelated]

8. Found this:

http://www.devinemiracles.com/soul-mates.html

Signs of a True Soul-Mate:

Instant magnetism,that you BOTH share
Unexplainable feeling of connection that is very deep right from the start.
A calm atmosphere, and inner calm.
There is instant trust
There is instant lifting of spirit
There is no nervousness
There are no judgments
There is patience & encouragement
There is a shoulder to cry on
You are never made to feel bad or lower than them
There is great equality
You think very much alike
Sex is optional-never forced or expected.
There is gentleness towards each other.
This person will also be your best friend
Will never restrict you
Loves you for YOU not just your physical appearance

[Why Syzygy]

9. I don't really know

what a soulmate is. But I stumbled into this at facebook....

Friendship

In the course of the years a close friendship will always reveal the shadow in the other as much as ourselves, to remain friends we must know the other and their difficulties and even their sins and encourage the best in them, not through critique but through addressing the better part of them, the leading creative edge of their incarnation, thus subtly discouraging what makes them smaller, less generous, less of themselves. Through the eyes of a real friendship an individual is larger than their everyday actions, and through the eyes of another we receive a greater sense of a self we can aspire to, the one in whom they have most faith. Friendship is a moving frontier of understanding, not only of self and other but of a possible and as yet unlived future.

- David Whyte
excerpted from Readers' Circle Essay, "Friendship"
©2011

[shill baby shill...]

10. Why do you ask?

Are you wanting one?

I have been in a relationship for 30 years with a man who is my best friend. However, I think it's very important to be realistic about love. So many women have childish notions about what a good marriage/partnership entails.

[Proud_Lefty]

11. Funny you'd bring this up

I spent years looking for my soul mate. The first man I talked marriage with was the one I married 24 years ago, and we're still together. The weird thing about it, though, is that over the past 5 years, I feel we're co-existing. We get along great, never fight, but the things we really enjoy was so different. He's definitely my significant other for this lifetime, but my soul mate? I don't think so. During a reading I had a while back, it was disclosed that my mother was my soul mate. She was my mother in this life time, but my soul mate on a universal level. Boy, did that stop me and make me think. I turned my back on her for years while I was looking for Mr. Right. I'm now with Mr. Right, and her life is over. She was my best friend. No one can replace her. You never know who that soul mate is in this life time. You have to think more outside the box (I think).

[SheilaT]

12. Personally, I think the whole idea of a "soulmate" is

not a useful one.

A lot of people, women mostly, seem to think that a "soulmate" is the perfect person for them, and that if they can just find their soulmate then they'll be happy forever.

From everything I've read (and I must say, the Michael Newton books are incredibly useful and enlightening in my opinion) the entire idea of a soulmate is neither useful nor accurate. We all have souls that we are connected to. We belong to a primary soul group and over the course of many lifetimes we'll have interactions and therefore connections with dozens, hundreds, and even thousands of other souls. Yes, there are some we're far more closely connected to than others. But to think that a soulmate is the one person we're supposed to spend our lives with here, preferably in bliss, is probably not true.

It's my understanding that we are here in this lifetime to fulfill the goals that we set for ourselves before we ever came here. Those goals are probably very complex, and involve the interactions of many others. Some of the people we connect with are here to help us, others are here to challenge us. Over the course of a long lifetime we will have many different goals.

Think back on your lifetime. If you're over even the age of 20, think about how much has changed already. I'm 64. I was married for 25 years, raised two sons, and then my husband met someone he decided he'd rather be with. I often say that it was only after twenty-five years of marriage that he (my now ex) finally met his true soul mate. Yes, I'm still somewhat angry about what happened, but I try very hard instead to focus on what was good during that time, and even more on our two wonderful sons. If I have a "soulmate" it's my best friend Don, a man I worked for nearly ten years with starting back in 1972. We never had a romantic relationship, but I constantly refer to him as my best friend in the entire world. In his life, he's never married. We live about 1500 miles apart, and very rarely see each other. But that does not affect the degree of friendship and affection we have for each other.

Perhaps the experience of a soulmate is highly individual. I don't doubt that for some they meet that perfect persona and life is wonderful forever after. But if we really are here to learn lessons and to grow spiritually (which I firmly believe) then all the trials and tribulations we do experience are all a part of that.

[kimmerspixelated]

13. Lots of good stuff here.

For myself, it wasn't a romantic question at all. I'm trying to make sense of a relationship(familial)
that may have been soul-mate-y. I'm thinking it has always been instructive, but if a soulmate is more loving and less critical or destructive ,then this family member wasn't a soul-mate, right? And yet, I'm still quite puzzled by it all. This person was difficult to say the least, and we seemed to push each others buttons. The trouble began when I finally stood up for myself, though and everything's different, now.

[SheilaT]

15. I would respectfully suggest that the challenges of that relationship

involve lessons you and the other person needed to learn. Don't even focus on the idea of a soul mate, or even thinking in terms of whether or not that person would be a soul mate. To do so is to miss the actual point of your relationship. This is just my opinion.

Myself, I often think of things that have happened in terms of, "What am I supposed to learn?" And rarely can I come up with a sensible answer to that question. So I just try to let it go, behave the best I can, and get on with my life. I try very hard to treat others with dignity and respect, and if I can do that consistently, I think I'm doing something right.

[kimmerspixelated]

16. I think you're right about this.

Yes, separating the ideas are tantamount. We're all here to learn.

Earth School.