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progressoid

(50,748 posts)
Sat Jul 18, 2015, 10:06 PM Jul 2015

Child’s Description Of Heaven During Near-Death Experience Specifically Mentions Book Deal

Child’s Description Of Heaven During Near-Death Experience Specifically Mentions Book Deal



NEW YORK—Speaking for the first time since waking from a medically induced coma following a devastating car accident, 8-year-old Aiden Miller recounted an extremely vivid near-death experience Friday that reportedly contained detailed descriptions of heaven, angels, and a six-figure book deal. “I was walking up in the clouds and met friends, and strangers, and all these famous people who talked with me about all kinds of things and brought up the possibility of selling the rights to my story to a big-name publisher,” said the second-grader, who attested that during the five-minute period in which his heart had stopped on the operating table, he ascended to a shining, golden paradise where he says he met with the archangel Gabriel and a literary agent who has helped a number of authors secure multi-book deals with lucrative worldwide book tours. “Jesus was sitting at the right hand of God and my grandfather was right there, and they looked at me and smiled at each other and said I should ask for an $80,000 advance with 10 percent of back-end profits.” Miller added that he felt a profound sense of peace and well-being when Jesus told him to go forth and seek a blockbuster deal for the movie rights.

http://www.theonion.com/article/childs-description-heaven-during-near-death-experi-50869




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Child’s Description Of Heaven During Near-Death Experience Specifically Mentions Book Deal (Original Post) progressoid Jul 2015 OP
Shit. That ain't nuthin'. Last night, I drempt I was getting laid. Hoppy Jul 2015 #1
I'm an old guy so the chance of me getttin' laid is less than... AlbertCat Jul 2015 #4
Jesus is my publishing agent. LiberalAndProud Jul 2015 #2
I knew it was a spoof when... onager Jul 2015 #3
..... Curmudgeoness Jul 2015 #5
 

Hoppy

(3,595 posts)
1. Shit. That ain't nuthin'. Last night, I drempt I was getting laid.
Sat Jul 18, 2015, 11:26 PM
Jul 2015

Now if you knew me, I ain't too good lookin' and I'm an old guy so the chance of me getttin' laid is less than that kid getting upstairs with Jesus.


I deserve a better book deal than that lyin' kid.

 

AlbertCat

(17,505 posts)
4. I'm an old guy so the chance of me getttin' laid is less than...
Sun Jul 19, 2015, 11:31 AM
Jul 2015

51 Shades of Grey..... in my hair.....

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