I have to post this: Pastor says his semen is 'holy milk'

[RussBLib]

Good gawd! How many flock fleecings does it take to drive some people away from church!? This is a new one. I thought the story of the African pastor demanding his female congregants attend church without underwear was outrageous, but this.....wow.

Pastor Makes Congregants Suck His Privates In Church, Says His Semen Is Holy Milk

Sobrino Valdeci Picanto, an evangelical pastor from Brazil, persuaded his followers that he practiced oral sex because it was the way he preached the word, saying that his ‘milk’ was sacred. And this pastor said his penis was blessed and that “the Lord had consecrated with divine milk of the Holy Spirit” and of course, had to go around evangelising.

“He convinced us that only God could come into our lives through the mouth”, a follower said, “Often, after worship, Pastor Valdeci asked us to do oral sex on him until the Holy Spirit came through ejaculation and delivered funds to the church.”

Sobrino Valdeci Picanto, 59, was arrested in Apore, Goiás, Brazil, for raping several women attending his church. He gave as an excuse that his penis had been consecrated with “divine semen of the Holy Spirit.” Valdeci came to abuse some elderly, and defends himself by saying that ‘he had an encounter with Jesus in a brothel and gave him the mission of spreading the sacred semen throughout the state, beginning with the faithful Apore Assembly, of which he is responsible’.

Denise Pinheiro, delegate of the region, said, “Valdecir was caught red-handed while rubbing his penis in the face of a local merchant, which promised to make more sales in her business due to the divine liquid.

It seems that Pastors are now scandal makers. For example, a Zimbabwean Pastor died shortly after sleeping with a prostitute, while another Pastor poured acid on a woman he was having an affair with and she died, , another Pastor was filmed sleeping with one of his married congregants.

The most shocking however, is a Pastor who tried to walk on water like Jesus did, and he drowned in front of his congregants, and another Pastor who asked to be buried alive so that he could ressurect himself like Jesus. Another self confessed Prophet died after fasting in the mountains for 30 days. He was found dead there.

Meanwhile some University students have since left their school and camped in the bush claiming they are waiting for Jesus to come back. You can read many more stories of Christians Gone Made here - Shocking Stories About Christians

Original.

[salimbag]

1. Mental illness

Difficult to determine the cause of the close association of religion and mental illness. Perhaps they are the same thing.

[AlbertCat]

2. Semen white.... milk white..... lead white

They're all white so they must be the same....

And of course MY lead white is sacred.

[trotsky]

4. I don't know that there is any way to distinguish between the two.

Imagine a world where Christianity doesn't exist. Now imagine somebody appearing and spreading its message:

Human sacrifice to appease a god
Ritualistic cannibalism to commemorate that sacrifice
etc., etc.

Everyone would think that person is insane. But because of when the ideas arose, and how many people believe them now, it's perfectly fine.

[AlbertCat]

3. which promised to make more sales in her business due to the divine liquid.

Is he denying male business owners of this great blessing?

[DetlefK]

5. If you are stupid enough to believe this, you deserve to suck a perverted pastor's dick.

Seriously. I have no pity for his victims. None.

[whatthehey]

6. Doesn't Brazil have an equivalent of Craigslist?

Seems an awful lot of effort to go to to get strangers to polish your pork sword.

[progressoid]

7. Oooookey.

[RussBLib]

8. well, this could be satire

I looked around a bit before I posted it, but I guess I didn't look long enough or far enough.

My apologies if it's truly satire.

People are so nuts these days, it's actually believeable.

I'll go sit in the corner for awhile.

[sakabatou]

9. I'm gonna go buy some brain bleach now...