Teacher Allegedly Forces 4-Year-Old to Write With Right Hand, 'Cause the Left One Belongs to Satan

[Capt. Obvious]

An Oklahoma four-year-old was reportedly saved from demonic possession last week after a sharp-eyed pre-K teacher noticed him writing with his left hand—the devil’s hand.

The anonymous hero teacher didn’t bother contacting the boy’s mother, Alisha Sands—also a left-hander and therefore under Satan’s power—just told the boy to write with his right hand from now on, and told that ol’ devil to let that child be!

But Sands and Satan cottoned onto what happened when they noticed young Zayde writing with his right (on so many levels!) hand at home, and challenged him about the change.

“I just asked ‘Is there anything his teachers ever asked about his hands?’ And he raises this one and says this one’s bad,” Sands told NewsChannel 4.

She wrote a note to the teacher with her demonic left hand, and got back an article explaining that lefties are “unlucky,” “evil,” and “sinister,” and the devil himself is left-handed.

....

Gawker

[beam me up scottie]

1. This happened to my older brother.

His teacher actually tied his left hand to the back of his chair to prevent him from writing. He was afraid to tell my parents so I did, my father rarely got angry but this sent him over the moon.

Unfortunately the teacher's tactic worked and my brother's handwriting is illegible.

[Capt. Obvious]

4. I remember the first grade teacher tying left arms behind backs.

[beam me up scottie]

6. They're insane.

Anyone who believes this crap is Delusional.

[Arugula Latte]

2. But I thought idle hands are the devil's workshop?

I'm so confused now. Should he keep the Evil Left Hand busy or not?

[trotsky]

3. Holy shit, that's still going on?

[beam me up scottie]

5. LOLOL! Comments:

okiedokieokie
Jay Hathaway
9/22/15 11:00am

I’m pretty sure that once I hit about 12-13, it was my right hand that belonged to Satan.

Read the replies, they're hilarious.

[RussBLib]

7. fire that stupid teacher

If I was the parent, I would insist on that.

[Capt. Obvious]

8. I expect Mike Huckabee to rush to Oklohoma

to campaign with the teacher.

[Curmudgeoness]

9. Of course, Satan is left-handed.

I have seen Obama using his left hand to write.



I didn't realize that they were still doing this with lefties. I hope that this situation gets resolved and it apparently will not be resolved locally, since it is Oklahoma.

[Warpy]

10. That used to be the norm in Catholic schools

and it happened to me, aided and abetted by my mother.

To this day, I hold a pencil oddly and write nearly upside down. However, I can use things like right handed scissors, so it's not all bad.

[mountain grammy]

12. Yep, my first husband and all of my left handed friends who

attended Catholic school said the same thing. Some were broken, most were not. But that was the old nuns, can't believe it's happening in public schools.

[Warpy]

13. Crackpot religion seems to be enjoying a resurgence

and the dimwit teacher undoubtedly heard it from an uneducated preacher.

[SwissTony]

14. This was the norm in my Catholic school in Scotland in the 50s.

But it was never "because" of Satan. Wev had to use pens that you dipped in an inkwell n lefties tended to smear what they had just written.

[Capt. Obvious]

17. This was the norm in my Catholic school in the 80's

[SwissTony]

18. Because of Satan?

I've got identical twin daughters. One's a leftie and one's a rightie. Often happens with identicals. But the leftie was allowed to write with her left hand.

[Capt. Obvious]

19. That

And reasons

[Duppers]

11. Well why doesn't she

just cut her left hand off?

Makes as much fucking sense.

[olddots]

15. the whole left & right crap goes way back

even before organized religion dumbth .Naturally the logically deprived call themselves the RIGHT like we're the wrong .

[AuntPatsy]

16. Never heard anyone doing this, horrific for that child...she should be fired