The Theologian's Nightmare by Bertrand Russell

[lindysalsagal]

http://www.positiveatheism.org/hist/russell3.htm

The Theologian's Nightmare by Bertrand Russell
"The eminent theologian Dr. Thaddeus dreamt that he died and pursued his course toward heaven. His studies had prepared him and he had no difficulty in finding the way. He knocked at the door of heaven, and was met with a closer scrutiny than he expected. "I ask admission," he said, "because I was a good man and devoted my life to the glory of God." "Man?" said the janitor, "What is that? And how could such a funny creature as you do anything to promote the glory of God?" Dr. Thaddeus was astonished. "You surely cannot be ignorant of man. You must be aware that man is the supreme work of the Creator." "As to that," said the janitor, "I am sorry to hurt your feelings, but what you're saying is news to me. I doubt if anybody up here has ever heard of this thing you call 'man.' However, since you seem distressed, you shall have a chance of consulting our librarian."

The librarian, a globular being with a thousand eyes and one mouth, bent some of his eyes upon Dr. Thaddeus. "What is this?" he asked the janitor. "This," replied the janitor, "says that it is a member of a species called 'man,' which lives in a place called 'Earth.' It has some odd notion that the Creator takes a special interest in this place and this species. I thought perhaps you could enlighten it." "Well," said the librarian kindly to the theologian, "perhaps you can tall me where this place is that you call 'Earth.'" "Oh," said the theologian, "it's part of the Solar System." "And what is the Solar System?" asked the librarian. "Oh," said the theologian, somewhat disconcerted, "my province was Sacred Knowledge, but the question that you are asking belongs to profane knowledge. However, I have learnt enough from my astronomical friends to be able to tell you that the Solar System is part of the Milky Way." "And what is the Milky Way?" asked the librarian. "Oh, the Milky Way is one of the Galaxies, of which, I am told, there are some hundred million." "Well, well," said the librarian, "you could hardly expect me to remember one out of so many. But I do remember to have heard the word galaxy' before. In fact, I believe that one of our sub-librarians specializes in galaxies. Let us send for him and see whether he can help."

After no very long time, the galactic sub-librarian made his appearance. In shape, he was a dodecahedron. It was clear that at one time his surface had been bright, but the dust of the shelves had rendered him dim and opaque. The librarian explained to him that Dr. Thaddeus, in endeavoring to account for his origin, had mentioned galaxies, and it was hoped that information could be obtained from the galactic section of the library. "Well," said the sub-librarian, "I suppose it might become possible in time, but as there are a hundred million galaxies, and each has a volume to itself, it takes some time to find any particular volume. Which is it that this odd molecule desires?" "It is the one called 'The Milky Way,'" Dr. Thaddeus falteringly replied. "All right," said the sub- librarian, "I will find it if I can."

More at link

[RussBLib]

1. good stuff

Bertie's "Why I Am Not a Christian" was probably THE book that really kicked my mind open.

[lindysalsagal]

2. Yeah. There's no getting past that.

Can't uncrack the egg. Aside from cancer, car accidents or imprisonment, no one ever goes back to the voodoo.

[mr blur]

3. One of my favourite Russell quotes:

“There is something feeble and a little contemptible about a man who cannot face the perils of life without the help of comfortable myths. Almost inevitably some part of him is aware that they are myths and that he believes them only because they are comforting. But he dares not face this thought!

Moreover, since he is aware, however dimly, that his opinions are not rational, he becomes furious when they are disputed."

- Bertrand Russell

I am reminded of it frequently in a certain place not a million miles from here.

[onager]

4. Need a map?

I remember reading somewhere that Russell's "Why I Am Not A Christian" was partly a response to C.S. Lewis' twaddle. Specifically "Mere Christianity."

When I was trying to figure out what I believed (or not), umpteen Xians urged me to read "Mere Christianity." They claimed that Lewis answers all the Big Questions, and that "MC" would convince me Xianity is absolutely true, using logic and rationality alone. Nearly everybody claimed it was the best argument for Xianity ever.

Well, if you've read that over-rated POS, you know it does no such thing. I remember putting it down and thinking something like: "Jebus on a trailer hitch! THIS is the absolute best argument for Xianity? Then Xianity is really in deep shit."

Here's somebody who agrees with me, Jeffrey Shallit, so naturally I'll link to him. I really like his conclusion:

Let's ignore all the hidden assumptions here and accept Lewis's analogy: theology is like a map. Well, then it is a very poor map indeed. If you compare two contemporary maps of the same place, you usually find lots of commonalities between them.

Not so with theology -- even if you restrict yourself to Christian theology. Christians can't even agree if faith alone, or good works plus faith, are required for salvation! Remember that itsy-bitsy schism called the Reformation? Why wasn't Lewis a follower of Joseph Smith or Mary Baker Eddy or Ellen G. White? They had their own competing maps, after all.

Maps are supposed to render what is there, not what one imagines is there. It would be a poor map indeed if one went to visit the place mapped and found it did not exist. But this happens all the time with theology; even Mother Theresa strongly doubted her own theological map. But why? Wasn't it based on, as Lewis claims, "the experience of hundreds of people who really were in touch with God"?

If theology really is a map, then it's more like a malfunctioning GPS. It's the kind of map that, if you follow it, takes you off the road and into the water. A really bad theology will fly your jet into buildings. Sometimes you'd be lucky just to survive.

http://recursed.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-vastly-overrated-c-s-lewis-shallow.html

[AlbertCat]

9. a response to C.S. Lewis' twaddle.

Oh.... I thought you meant that Narnia crap.

Perhaps Lewis was looking at a map of Middle Earth.... from another Christian "create my own mythology" nut. They were buddies.


I read a book by one of these Christian fantasy nuts written in 1932 called "The Greater Trumps"...about Tarot cards which at the time (early '70s) fascinated me greatly. No, I didn't think they divined anything (actually, that notion of fortune telling doesn't even come in until the 19th century) but the history of cards and the artwork, the idea of what a pack of cards are, and stuff like that. Anyway, it was kinda a fun fantasy. But that endless Narnia and LOTR stuff....zzzzzzzzz....

[DetlefK]

5. I have come to the opinion that religion is a deeply egotistical and immature mindset.

People believe because it makes them happy. They tell comforting lies, to themselves and to others, because it makes them happy.
When hard-pressed to come up with reasons or evidence for their continued belief, they dodge and weave and evade.
When hard-pressed to come up with reasons or evidence for why they believe exactly this and not something similar, they dodge and weave and evade.
Why?
Because not having that belief would make them unhappy.
That's all there is. Happiness or unhappiness. And they choose comforting illusions.

They aren't trying to explore or grow or understand or doubt. The joy of discovery, the frustration of failure.
Instead they set up a comforting illusion where everything they want is defined as true and existing.
"Congratulations to myself! I am special and deserving and everybody adores me and I'm best friends with the most important being in the universe!"

What's the difference to a drug-addict or child?

[lindysalsagal]

8. Endless childhood. Relinquishing adult responsibility.

"Oh, well! It's God's will!!"

Religion is global sibling rivalry. Nothing more.

[deucemagnet]

6. Interesting read.

If Russell were alive today, I'm sure that he'd be labeled a "New Atheist" and his every utterance and choice of T-shirts would be under scrutiny by intrepid religious keyboard warriors.

[lindysalsagal]

7. No doubt!