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Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
Fri Apr 22, 2016, 01:32 PM Apr 2016

A talk with a hospital chaplain

I was in hospital in San Diego a few months ago and was asked if I wanted to talk to a counsellor. "OK", I said, keeping the comma carefully outside the quotation marks, "why not?".

"The counsellor will be a chaplain; will that be OK?", they asked.

"Well, I'm not religious and don't want any proselytising, but otherwise that's OK", I answered.

So a very nice woman came by my room and we had a friendly chat lasting about 15 minutes. At the end, she asked if I had any objection to her saying a prayer for me. I don't know how most of you would feel about that, but I said it was OK, and got a brief, non-denominational prayer telling God what a lovely chap I was and to please push back my expiration date a bit further.

I thanked her and she left me with a smile and a piece of paper requesting a charitable donation to her organisation which I then promptly lost in the confusion afterwards.

I didn't think anything of it, but it turns out my wife had tried to call me during that time and was told I couldn't be disturbed because I was talking to a chaplain. She panicked because she quite reasonably assumed I'd either gone soft in the head or was otherwise receiving last rites. It didn't help that the cell phone service went out around that time and she couldn't get a hold of me for several hours during which time she assumed the worst. We had a good laugh over that later and that's not why I'm writing this now.

I opened (yet another) bill pertaining to that visit this morning and saw that I had been charged $400 for my 15 minute conversation with the chaplain!

I don't know if I should object to the charge (the insurance passed on paying for it) or what, but this was certainly an unpleasant surprise. I assumed I'd been talking to a kind-hearted volunteer. Frankly, I was just being polite! Shows you how naive I am, I suppose, and what being polite gets you these days...

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A talk with a hospital chaplain (Original Post) Ron Obvious Apr 2016 OP
If you say good morning to a Doctor walking by your Downwinder Apr 2016 #1
Outrageous. Yes you should object. Duppers Apr 2016 #2
Religious affiliation Ron Obvious Apr 2016 #3
The biggest hospital chain out here is run by 7th day adventists OriginalGeek Apr 2016 #7
Don't feel bad about it. progressoid Apr 2016 #8
You shouldn't feel bad at all. onager Apr 2016 #9
No apparent religious affiliation... Ron Obvious Apr 2016 #10
It's only $300... AlbertCat Apr 2016 #4
My grandfather was a Methodist minister awoke_in_2003 Apr 2016 #5
Hell yes you should object! Brainstormy Apr 2016 #6
Since they asked you edhopper Apr 2016 #11
Shame on you for saying "yes". Curmudgeoness Apr 2016 #12
Fair enough Ron Obvious Apr 2016 #14
Oh, my. That explains it. Curmudgeoness Apr 2016 #16
Oh, I don't disagree Ron Obvious Apr 2016 #17
Do let us know how this ends. nt Curmudgeoness Apr 2016 #19
Thanks for the great laugh. rurallib Apr 2016 #13
Here's what I do with such things Major Nikon Apr 2016 #15
Thanks for that... Ron Obvious Apr 2016 #18
Thanks for the warning.. mountain grammy Apr 2016 #20

Duppers

(28,244 posts)
2. Outrageous. Yes you should object.
Fri Apr 22, 2016, 01:51 PM
Apr 2016

I've never heard of such a thing.

After I lost my baby daughter, the hospital sent a therapist to see me for a brief chat but I wasn't charged for that.

Just curious if the hospital has any religious affiliation?

 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
3. Religious affiliation
Fri Apr 22, 2016, 02:35 PM
Apr 2016

No, the hospital had a completely generic name and I've no reason to assume a religious affiliation.

I'll probably fight the charges but I'll still feel a little bad for doing so... Yeah, I know, but I will...

OriginalGeek

(12,132 posts)
7. The biggest hospital chain out here is run by 7th day adventists
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 01:13 AM
Apr 2016

You wouldn't know it by the name. Just generic hospital name. Never had to stay at one so no idea if they charge for their mythology but i'da prolly gone ballistic if that happened to me.

progressoid

(50,734 posts)
8. Don't feel bad about it.
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 01:26 AM
Apr 2016

Tell them you need a bill from further up the chain of command in order to pay it. You need a bill from God, not one of his minions.

onager

(9,356 posts)
9. You shouldn't feel bad at all.
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 06:31 AM
Apr 2016

This is unbelievable. I have friends and relatives who are ordained preachers. As someone else said, they often visit hospitals at all hours of the night to comfort the sick and their families. I also know many people who have requested such visits when they or their relatives were sick.

Not one has ever been asked for a contribution. And they certainly never got a bill for such services.

I'm amazed. I would complain loudly about this.

 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
10. No apparent religious affiliation...
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 02:18 PM
Apr 2016

As far as I can google, the hospital does not have any apparent religious affiliations. The question hadn't occurred to me, but in light of the discussion I had with a senior nurse (she talked being a believer) and the comments here, I thought I'd check it out further.

I'm glad to see people here also found it outrageous. I will be calling them back tomorrow.

 

AlbertCat

(17,505 posts)
4. It's only $300...
Fri Apr 22, 2016, 05:34 PM
Apr 2016

..... without the prayer.



I wouldn't pay it. Especially since it isn''t medicine, nor therapy, and they should tell you it costs something beforehand.

 

awoke_in_2003

(34,582 posts)
5. My grandfather was a Methodist minister
Sat Apr 23, 2016, 12:16 AM
Apr 2016

I can't count how many times he went to the hospital in the middle of the night to be with family. Amount of extra dollars collected? Zero. It was considered part of the job.

Brainstormy

(2,426 posts)
6. Hell yes you should object!
Sat Apr 23, 2016, 11:15 AM
Apr 2016

And you should complain to the hospital, to the chaplain directly, and to the organization she represents! The very idea!

edhopper

(34,724 posts)
11. Since they asked you
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 04:29 PM
Apr 2016

and did not tell you there would be a charge, Hell yes object.

Let them know your are not paying period, call them on this bullshit.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)
12. Shame on you for saying "yes".
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 06:34 PM
Apr 2016

I am dumbfounded that you were billed for this. Not only would I object to the bill, I would write a letter to the editor of your local paper to warn other people about how they are charging for a prayer and let them know how much it will cost them. This is the most outrageous thing I have heard in a long time.

 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
14. Fair enough
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 08:20 PM
Apr 2016

I remembered at the time that many chaplains are also licensed counsellors/therapist so it just didn't seem outrageous.

Frankly, as a self-reliant introvert and hermit, I'm rather allergic to the whole notion of therapy/counselling in the first place. I know people who have been in therapy for decades (OK, in NYC), and I get the impression therapy is keeping a lot of them dependent rather than focussing on making them self-reliant.

Of course, those are my prejudices, and I'm sure lots of people have been helped tremendously by therapy.

Well, that's what being open-minded gets you these days: a $400 bill.

Curmudgeoness

(18,219 posts)
16. Oh, my. That explains it.
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 08:57 PM
Apr 2016

I see now why you agreed to it in the first place...."introvert". I hope that will not stop you from fighting this. Sometimes, you have to speak up, even if it makes you really uncomfortable. Remember that.

 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
17. Oh, I don't disagree
Wed Apr 27, 2016, 11:40 AM
Apr 2016

It's true that I'm not big on confrontational arguments (but yes, I DID in fact protest this particular bill), but I don't think I'm a pushover in general or that introverts are more likely to be, at least in my experience.

In any case, it wasn't just politeness or conflict avoidance that made me agree to see the counsellor. Being in hospital is pretty boring by and large, and I thought it would make a welcome break from watching The Rifleman and the home improvement shows. I didn't have my computer or books with me, nor a smart phone.

rurallib

(63,166 posts)
13. Thanks for the great laugh.
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 08:19 PM
Apr 2016

Not sure if that is what you meant to do, but damn that was funny.

If it was me, I would call the hospital and tell them that no one told me that prayer was a charged service. Thus I feel no obligation to pay it. It has no therapeutic value and is really against my personal beliefs and I was just being a nice guy and friendly.

Major Nikon

(36,899 posts)
15. Here's what I do with such things
Sun Apr 24, 2016, 08:32 PM
Apr 2016

I take the bill and write SUE ME in big letters across it and mail it back along with a letter telling them to not contact me again. Then you mail it via certified mail, return receipt and keep a copy. Per federal law they can't contact you about it again.

 

Ron Obvious

(6,261 posts)
18. Thanks for that...
Wed Apr 27, 2016, 11:44 AM
Apr 2016

I didn't know that about the federal law about not being able to be contacted. I will certainly keep that in mind next time I have a dispute with a contractor who charges me for things they broke and tries to harass me daily through phone and email to get me to pay. For the record, they never sued either.

mountain grammy

(27,227 posts)
20. Thanks for the warning..
Thu Apr 28, 2016, 08:16 AM
Apr 2016

although I don't think I would agree to such a visit, anything's possible in a weak moment, and, yes, I would protest the charge and absolutely refuse to pay it. Good luck and good health!

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