My Life in the Seminary: Part 1--Lent

[Goblinmonger]

So, I spend my high school years in a Catholic seminary and was very seriously considering the priesthood. That, of course, before I devoted my life to Dawkins.

Anyway. Thought I'd share a few stories. These will probably wander. If you want me to stop, just let me know.

I do want to preface with the fact that I loved my time at the seminary. I have no love for the RCC at this point in my life, but my seminary days were a great experience. It was a boarding school. I still, over 30 years later, have strong friendships with people I went to school there with and consider them my brothers. The priests I had as teachers were awesome--some a little weird, but awesome.

So, Lent. I grew up in a very serious conservative Catholic family (probably the reason for considering the priesthood). Lent and sacrifice was a big thing. From as early as I can remember I was required to give something up that was going to hurt. My mom demanded it. She hit the sacrifice of Jesus very hard during this season.

For those that aren't Catholic, if you count the days between Ash Wednesday and Easter, there are actually 46 days. As a Catholic, you can technically take Sunday's off from what you are giving up. Let me tell you, that was not looked on favorably by my mom or the people I grew up with that were Catholic. That was for the weak. That was for children. When I learned about that exemption in middle school, I told my mom I was going to do that. She said, "Why? Are you a little baby?" So I learned that early on.

When I got to the seminary, it wasn't as hardline, but I learned that Catholics are still not supposed to eat meat on Fridays outside of lent unless they give up something else. Every Friday meal every week was meatless for us. Their attitude toward Lent was a little different. Rather than the pretty-much sack cloth and ashes attitude of my mom, Lent became a time for self-reflection about what we could do better in our life and our shortcomings. Something that I still do a lot of even after 30 or so years of not believing in any God. Still weird that my mom was the hard ass and the priests at the seminary were less so. Especially the one Jesuit that taught there. Loved that guy.

So, anyway, that's the Lent story. I have some funny shit I can tell you in the coming weeks.

[jodymarie aimee]

1. My Dad is a Catholic priest

we had priest and nun aunts and uncles. Nana had 4 boys, and not one went into the clergy. That later changed. Dad married Mom, had 7 kids, then at 40 went back to school and was ordained 1978. So I know exactly what you are talking about. 12 years of Catholic school for me, didn't have a lay teacher until college.

Both of my parents abused me as a little kid. And still do if I am in their presence. Dad will be 90 this year, Mom 86. I cut ties with them 2 years ago and feel free. Religion did NOT make them good people. I still have nitemares and am digging my way out.

Keep writing my brother.

[Warpy]

2. My Irish Catholic (more Catholic than the pope!) family didn't run to priests and nuns

They ran more to shipping and mercantile work and it was whispered that it was the family fool who went into the church. My dad's family were also true believers but the only one who'd considered going into the church was my grandmother, because she was 30 when she'd raised the last of her orphaned siblings and thought nobody'd want to marry her. The local priest arranged her marriage, instead.

My own memory of Lent was being deprived of candy, at least at home. By the time I was 10, I knew it was bullshit so if another kid shared, I ate. My dad gave up alcohol and my mother said he was like a bear with a sore head for the duration. I do know the tension at home decreased markedly after Easter church when he'd pour himself a large bourbon on the rocks. I never saw my mother give anything up, I suppose she thought her life had enough privation year round.

Fortunately, they knew better than to send me off to a convent school. My mother had gotten kicked out of one at the age of 12 and they knew the apple hadn't fallen far from the tree.

I've been a disappointment to them, a pretty much lifelong apostate and heathen, having realized at ten that I had been afraid not to believe but really didn't buy a word of it. My mother once asked me if I'd gotten anything out of a Catholic education and I replied sure, that hypocrisy was the key to getting along in life. She was smart enough to laugh and tell me that was the best lesson.

They both died unbelievers, my mother finally having read the bible and emerging angry at all the lies she'd been told. I don't know what nudged my father over the edge, he was on his deathbed and I wasn't about to grill him on it. I just know that they both died free of the fear of judgment and hell fire and I'm grateful for that.

[Lordquinton]

3. Wonderful story

Thanks for sharing.

[beam me up scottie]

4. Thanks for sharing, I look forward to more stories.

It's interesting to hear from someone who actually attended Seminary and then rejected the Church.

We've been chasitzed here before for criticizing religion as if atheists are incapable of understanding the subject matter. In my experience DU atheists are more knowledgeable about religion than believers.

[Goblinmonger]

5. Thanks. I have lots of memories. Some hilarious.

I live in a pretty Catholic area so I get reminded of Lent even though I'm not in the church. It's interesting to see people around me doing what they gave up for Lent just because it was a Sunday. Even at the much less harsh seminary setting, my spiritual advisor (and the advisor of others I know) made it pretty clear that the Sunday exception was not something to use a lot. That is was actually possible for us to sacrifice for the whole period and learn from it.

Not my "problem" anymore, I guess. But I know I still have a lot of that attitude in me.

[beam me up scottie]

6. I grew up in a majority Catholic region.

As an outsider it was a little bizarre but we non-Catholics didn't make a big deal out of it.

I remember one of my brother's friends forgot he was supposed to be fasting and ate some cookies at our house. When my brother reminded him it wasn't midnight yet he looked like he was going to faint - but I'm sure that was because he was worried his mother and grandmother would find out more than concern for his immortal soul.

[rurallib]

7. yes - we want more

I have a question - on the meatless Fridays were you allowed to eat fish?
There was one family I knew that considered fish meat, which it really is.
I could never understand why fish wasn't meat.

There was another family that did not consider fish nor chicken as meat. Seems no one ate turkey in those days.

[Goblinmonger]

8. Somewhat ironic question.

Yes, it is OK to eat fish on Fridays when Catholic.

After leaving the seminary, I went vegetarian after about 6 years (not related to leaving seminary). Have been vegetarian for almost 30 years. Ovo-lacto so I eat dairy and eggs but not fish.