I just realized something a few days ago - I didn't just lose a wife; I lost a family

[derby378]

Ginny couldn't have children due to medical reasons. She didn't really want one, anyway, and that's not why I fell in love with her in the first place. But we managed to raise our own family, anyway. At one point, we shared our humble home with two cats, three parakeets, and a cockatiel. Most of them were rescues.

Now they're all gone, and I've been left behind by the rest of my family.

I don't know why it took me so long to articulate this in my own mind. Each death of a furbaby or "winged potato" affected me differently, but only now can I look at their deaths as something collective instead of individual occurrences. It doesn't make the loneliness any easier, but it does help to put a new perspective on things.

All of these critters greeted the day with us, capered with us, shared our joys and sorrows, welcomed us home from another bout with the daily grind. I still deal with guilt feelings that I couldn't prolong their lives at times, but maybe it's just that I'm having trouble letting go. That's the hardest part of all.

Perhaps I could start a new family of my own, take in a little rescue kitty from the SPCA or maybe right off the street (we've done this before), but my financial situation really needs to improve before I can feel comfortable enough to do this. It's at least a goal I can set for myself.

[hlthe2b]

1. You might think about fostering an animal... Normally, shelters or rescue groups provide

for the food and other costs of care and it really does help out shelters with limited room. Usually this is for dogs, but I'd expect many shelters ask for foster homes for cats and other animals as well.

I am one who can understand your loss.... I impulsively adopted a 9 mo old pup from my shelter after "accidentally" viewing her photo in the newspaper-- eight months after the loss of my last beloved furry girl. I really wasn't ready, but then again, I really was...

Best wishes. "Animal people" need to remain "animal people", I think... I know it is my small way of giving back.

[MadamYes]

2. I'm moved by your statement.

I'm sorry to hear about your losses. But it appears you are animal lover.
I suggest starting with another parakeet. The expense would be minimal. In return you would have company, and affection to give & receive.

[auntAgonist]

3. hey Derby! I think of you often and miss Ginny a fair bit. It is so good to see you here

and to read a little more of your love for one another and your furbabies.

Goals are a good thing and you've done so well in nurturing your pets, I'm sure you have enough room in your heart for more.
When finances and time is right you'll know it

Birds are great companions ! Maybe one will fly into your life again

Sorry if this post is a tad incoherent and all over the place I was just checking here before bed and I've already taken my night meds so I'm a tad loopy.

Much love to you D.
take care.

kesha
aA