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orleans

(34,892 posts)
Fri Jan 31, 2014, 01:12 AM Jan 2014

the question: "what is grief?"

"Grief is the internal part of loss, how we feel. The internal work of grief is a process, a journey. It does not end on a certain day or date. It is as individual as each of us. Grief is real because loss is real. Each grief has its own imprint, as distinctive and as unique as the person we lost. The pain of loss is so intense, so heartbreaking, because in loving we deeply connect with another human being, and grief is the reflection of the connection that has been lost."
http://grief.com/

The Best Things to Say to Someone in Grief
1. I am so sorry for your loss.
2. I wish I had the right words, just know I care.
3. I don’t know how you feel, but I am here to help in anyway I can.
4. You and your loved one will be in my thoughts and prayers.
5. My favorite memory of your loved one is…
6. I am always just a phone call away
7. Give a hug instead of saying something
8. We all need help at times like this, I am here for you
9. I am usually up early or late, if you need anything
10. Saying nothing, just be with the person

The Worst Things to Say to Someone in Grief
1. At least she lived a long life, many people die young
2. He is in a better place
3. She brought this on herself
4. There is a reason for everything
5. Aren’t you over him yet, he has been dead for awhile now
6. You can have another child still
7. She was such a good person God wanted her to be with him
8. I know how you feel
9. She did what she came here to do and it was her time to go
10. Be strong
http://grief.com/10-best-worst-things-to-say-to-someone-in-grief/

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the question: "what is grief?" (Original Post) orleans Jan 2014 OP
K&R Ron Obvious Jan 2014 #1
This is a good list Mojorabbit Jan 2014 #2
Thank you for posting this livetohike Feb 2014 #3

Mojorabbit

(16,020 posts)
2. This is a good list
Fri Jan 31, 2014, 11:26 AM
Jan 2014

I am over people telling me how I will be ok because I am such a strong person. Right now I don't feel strong at all or that everything will be ok.

livetohike

(22,925 posts)
3. Thank you for posting this
Tue Feb 4, 2014, 09:33 AM
Feb 2014
I have one for the worst list:

When my husband's Aunt died at age 63 (in 1994), someone actually said this to his cousin, who was an only child. I was standing with her when this was said.

"Your family was so small and now it is even smaller!" No kidding.

Most people do not know how to react and blurt out anything. This is very good to see here.
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