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CanonRay

(14,903 posts)
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 09:40 AM Apr 2024

Yesterday I lerned my best friend had passed.

We were roomies in college, and met 54 years ago. He was a year younger than I. I had a missed call at 6am from his phone, and he was no early bird. When I called back his brother answered so I felt my gut tighten. Sure enough, they found him the evening of the 16h. He had apparently come in his house and lay down on the bed and never got up. The bed was not even mussed. He had a pacemaker but otherwise was in great health, and very conscious of his diet and exercise.

One of the truly nice guys in this world...he is and will be missed. He never married, but was very content with hi life in the town where he grew up. He was always happy.

I stayed at his house last June, and I'm so thankful I got to spend some time with him. You just never know when you are going to lose someone close.


This one hit me hard.

53 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Yesterday I lerned my best friend had passed. (Original Post) CanonRay Apr 2024 OP
My condolences for the loss of your friend. The Polack MSgt Apr 2024 #1
(( CanonRay )) blm Apr 2024 #2
"" AllaN01Bear Apr 2024 #3
I am so sorry for your loss. barbtries Apr 2024 #4
I am so sorry for your loss. MLAA Apr 2024 #5
Deepest sympathy. Losing a friend is so hard. 50 Shades Of Blue Apr 2024 #6
I'm so sorry to hear this. onecaliberal Apr 2024 #7
My condolences to you Wicked Blue Apr 2024 #8
Sending you lots of love, Goddessartist Apr 2024 #9
(((💐))) Deuxcents Apr 2024 #10
I'm so sorry. redwitch Apr 2024 #11
I'm very sorry for your loss. brer cat Apr 2024 #12
I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. My condolences to you, his family, and his friends. It is always LoisB Apr 2024 #13
So very sorry. people Apr 2024 #14
So sorry. Elessar Zappa Apr 2024 #15
It is hard to lose friends mnhtnbb Apr 2024 #16
Love and more love to you. Hope22 Apr 2024 #17
I'm so sorry, CanonRay whathehell Apr 2024 #18
I'm so sorry for your loss. onlyadream Apr 2024 #19
I am sorry about your loss. (n/t) OldBaldy1701E Apr 2024 #20
I'm sorry. Mickju Apr 2024 #21
I am so very sorry for your profound loss. May you and all his loved niyad Apr 2024 #22
I am so very sorry for your great loss irisblue Apr 2024 #23
I'll share some of your pain. multigraincracker Apr 2024 #24
I'm sad for your loss, and glad for your time together and fond, peaceful remembrance of him. ancianita Apr 2024 #25
So sorry for this.... Karadeniz Apr 2024 #26
So sorry for your lost. n/t iluvtennis Apr 2024 #27
At least you spent some recent time w/ him. Thank goodness for small miracles. We really never know when SWBTATTReg Apr 2024 #28
Sorry for your loss Old Curler Apr 2024 #29
I'm sorry, Old Curler FemDemERA Apr 2024 #50
Thanx. Old Curler Apr 2024 #53
When the good guys go, we are all just a little bit poorer. calimary Apr 2024 #30
I'm so sorry for your loss. cate94 Apr 2024 #31
Wishing you strength, peace, and warmth as you deal with this terrible loss. keopeli Apr 2024 #32
I am so sorry. pandr32 Apr 2024 #33
May his memory be eternal. Mme. Defarge Apr 2024 #34
Old gal here. I hope that's the way I go, nice and easy. Very sorry for your loss, but I believe he's still with you. Joinfortmill Apr 2024 #35
I'm so sorry for your loss. May every good memory livetohike Apr 2024 #36
I am so sorry mgardener Apr 2024 #37
I'm so very sorry for your loss Hekate Apr 2024 #38
Peace world wide wally Apr 2024 #39
(((((HUGS))))) UpInArms Apr 2024 #40
Sorry XanaDUer2 Apr 2024 #41
Thank you all for you well wishes and expressions of sympathy CanonRay Apr 2024 #42
I'm sorry you're going through this. It's very difficult (and sobering) to watch same-age classmates * Oopsie Daisy Apr 2024 #43
I have so many memories CanonRay Apr 2024 #46
Condolences gademocrat7 Apr 2024 #44
condolences OldSWODog Apr 2024 #45
Im so sorry CanonRay sdfernando Apr 2024 #47
I'm sorry for your loss FemDemERA Apr 2024 #48
My deepest condolences. sinkingfeeling Apr 2024 #49
So Sorry. There is nothing like old friends - they know all our highs and lows. ☮ walkingman Apr 2024 #51
So sorry, CanonRay.❤️ littlemissmartypants Apr 2024 #52

blm

(113,841 posts)
2. (( CanonRay ))
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 09:44 AM
Apr 2024

Peaceful - it sounds like he had a peaceful way about him, even in his passing.

Condolences to you and the family.

barbtries

(29,915 posts)
4. I am so sorry for your loss.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 09:53 AM
Apr 2024

You are not alone. I just found out yesterday that the husband of a family member died. He'd been sick with cancer for over a year but did not want anyone to know. This man was in his fifties.

When one of my 2 lifelong friends was dying, I went across country to visit her. It was a sad visit but I am so happy that I did, because it meant so much to her. I am really happy for you that you were able to spend time with your friend!

MLAA

(18,654 posts)
5. I am so sorry for your loss.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 09:53 AM
Apr 2024

A college roommate can be a special friendship, both experience so much that is new and living in close quarters. May the memories of your adventures and laughter bring you some comfort soon. 💗

LoisB

(8,875 posts)
13. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. My condolences to you, his family, and his friends. It is always
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 10:53 AM
Apr 2024

doubly sad when the world loses one of the nice people.
Hugs

people

(705 posts)
14. So very sorry.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 10:54 AM
Apr 2024

That would put a giant hole in my heart to lose my best friend. Glad you were able to spend time with him last June.

mnhtnbb

(32,103 posts)
16. It is hard to lose friends
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:00 AM
Apr 2024

who have been in our lives for so many years. People who knew us when...

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Hope22

(3,042 posts)
17. Love and more love to you.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:04 AM
Apr 2024

I’m thankful you had a visit with your friend. Friendship is magical. I imagine you will hear and see your friend when you least expect it. My heart goes out you. 🙏🏼💗💗💐

onlyadream

(2,221 posts)
19. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:08 AM
Apr 2024

I lost a friend like that 4 years ago, it came out of the blue and words can't describe the loss. I think about him all the time (knew him since I was 8).

Interestingly, when I found out he passed (it was April fools day, the first week of lock down in 2020) I was so distraught that I had to get out of the house to do something. So I got in my car and started to drive down the road. Soon as I pulled out of my driveway, I noticed my mailbox was open. I thought it strange bc everyone was freaking out about Covid and NO one was out. Then, as I drove down the road, I noticed that every single mailbox was open. My friend was a mailman. I really did think he was sending me a message that he's okay.

niyad

(120,410 posts)
22. I am so very sorry for your profound loss. May you and all his loved
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:22 AM
Apr 2024

ones find peace.

multigraincracker

(34,208 posts)
24. I'll share some of your pain.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:29 AM
Apr 2024

I got a pacemaker about 3 years ago. I read the average life for someone my age that got a pacemaker is 5 years. The only thing going for me is I don’t have any A-fib.
I really don’t wish to out live my loved ones, but would like to outlive all of my enemies.
Peace be with you.

ancianita

(38,785 posts)
25. I'm sad for your loss, and glad for your time together and fond, peaceful remembrance of him.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:40 AM
Apr 2024

SWBTATTReg

(24,260 posts)
28. At least you spent some recent time w/ him. Thank goodness for small miracles. We really never know when
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:51 AM
Apr 2024

we all will go to the big theater upstairs, but one must, if they can, try to get w/ friends and family and spend quality time w/ them. Sure things are different after 54 years, but the tug of friendship is still strong, and you're still thinking of them (and them you), and that's what counts. My best to you and his family.

Old Curler

(11 posts)
29. Sorry for your loss
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 11:56 AM
Apr 2024

Unexpected death is so hard. My wife of 35 years died a similar death this Easter Saturday. She was 68 with no health issues. May time heal your heart.

calimary

(84,502 posts)
30. When the good guys go, we are all just a little bit poorer.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 12:01 PM
Apr 2024

I’m so sorry about the loss of your friend. I wish you comfort and great solace. You don’t mourn alone as long as you’re here.

keopeli

(3,579 posts)
32. Wishing you strength, peace, and warmth as you deal with this terrible loss.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 12:17 PM
Apr 2024

I feel deeply for you, though I don't know you. Your struggle is familiar to me and I wish I could offer you more consolation. Life is fragile. What a blessing that you were able to have a good visit last June.

Blessings to you, CanonRay.

Joinfortmill

(16,567 posts)
35. Old gal here. I hope that's the way I go, nice and easy. Very sorry for your loss, but I believe he's still with you.
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 12:42 PM
Apr 2024

livetohike

(23,020 posts)
36. I'm so sorry for your loss. May every good memory
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 02:01 PM
Apr 2024

of your times together and the stories you’ll tell always bring a smile .

mgardener

(1,900 posts)
37. I am so sorry
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 03:31 PM
Apr 2024

My cousin died in the Fall.
He was like my big brother growing up.
We parted ways during COVID. Thought it was over blown. Was never going to get the vaccine
AND Trump.
I thought about calling him last summer and I did not. Our last conversation was so terrible.He developed lung cancer caught COVID and died.

CanonRay

(14,903 posts)
42. Thank you all for you well wishes and expressions of sympathy
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 04:39 PM
Apr 2024

Love the support DUers always show.

Oopsie Daisy

(4,534 posts)
43. I'm sorry you're going through this. It's very difficult (and sobering) to watch same-age classmates *
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 05:41 PM
Apr 2024

* and playmate cousins, and younger siblings die before we do. I hope your friend lived a good life and that you have many comforting memories of the times you spent together. Be well.

CanonRay

(14,903 posts)
46. I have so many memories
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 08:01 PM
Apr 2024

as he was a unique individual. I'm sure he's pissed he can't vote Trump out.

OldSWODog

(74 posts)
45. condolences
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 06:23 PM
Apr 2024

CR, greetings...losing family is one thing, losing friends that we have chosen is somehow different but still hard to fathom...take care of yourself and fondly remember your roomie...OSD

sdfernando

(5,399 posts)
47. Im so sorry CanonRay
Thu Apr 18, 2024, 09:17 PM
Apr 2024

Losing a best friend is so hard. In many ways harder than a family member.

Relish the good times you had with him, which I'm sure are many.

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