Bereavement
Related: About this forumI know I'm not ready
Awhile back as I was shopping there was a woman who turned up on all the aisles I was at. That could be coincidence but each time I saw her she was already looking and smiling at me. It happened about 7-8 times. Even when I was loading groceries in the back of my car. She had a beautiful smile and lit up face. I kind of wanted to say something. But just left. Its been a year and 3 months since my wife passed away. Im still a mess and confused. Now Im wondering if I should have said something. I have no idea if I will ever take that step.
FarPoint
(13,675 posts)She knew you got the message... She want's you to know she is always with you....it's all good.
Clouds Passing
(2,555 posts)bullimiami
(13,996 posts)multigraincracker
(34,208 posts)When ready you could introduce yourself and just ask her to meet for coffee. Then you could rxplain that you are still are missing you wife, but open to friendships. Then just look for things you have income.
Bet you might find a good friend without getting ahead of yourself.
peacebuzzard
(5,282 posts)just take your time...
LoisB
(8,875 posts)Lonestarblue
(11,932 posts)Youll know when youre ready. There is no rush.
maptap22
(152 posts)It has been 6 years since my husband died. Took a good 4 years for me to start feeling somewhat "normal" again. I was super angry for a long time. We were married for 32 years and 1 day. He was my best friend, we did everything together. It was so difficult (and still is) to live my life without my person by my side. Even now after all this time, I still want to talk to him about my day, politics, our pets...everything. My advice - take your time because time is the only thing that helps.
Again, my condolences. Losing a spouse is brutal.
Marthe48
(19,199 posts)The veneer of feeling normal gets a little thicker as time passes. I have some pictures of my husband where I can see them, and I talk to him.
I don't mind talking to men when I'm out, but it's just chitchat, and keeps me sociable.
electric_blue68
(18,463 posts)Sorry for your loss.
My Mom got very sick w asthma when was about 5 1/2. A very vital woman reduced to fighting for breath often hour, after hour etc.
Eventually she improved, and even got waaaay better about ?11 yrs later.
Anyway, when she got to her early '80's I started thinking how much longer did she have. She wasn't my best friend, but a quite a remarkable person in many ways. Loved her so much. I started thinking to myself;
she wouldn't want me to be too sad for too long.
Now, I was going grieve; however I think repeating this to myself for several years did help me. While devastating when it happened bc it had a sort of freak medical aspect - I think it took the sharpest edge off.
Your dear love would want you and it's a gentle step by step process to have happiness in your life.
Marthe48
(19,199 posts)You lost your wife in a traumatic way and way too soon. One of these days you'll return a smile, enjoy a bit of conversation. How soon is up to you. How far any chance meeting will go is also up to you. Don't feel bad if you aren't ready or don't want something more.