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EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 10:12 AM Dec 2016

How I would handle being on a flight with Ivanka Trump

Had I found myself on a flight with Ivanka Trump, I would never have screamed at her. Not only don't I behave that way toward anyone - and I refuse to allow my disgust and horror Trump turn me into a lesser, uglier version of myself - that kind of behavior doesn't result in any outcome other than venting, which is useless at this point.

Instead, I would see this as a great opportunity, not to let off some steam but to actually try to get her to think in a different way. I would go to my seat, carefully think about one - just one - issue I care about, pull out a piece of paper and write out a short note explaining it, and also develop a short and to-the-point "elevator" comment about it. I would then wait until the flight took off, walk up the aisle to her and politely ask for a moment of her time. I would calmly but firmly make my point and hand her the note - along with my card - and invite her to contact me if she wishes to discuss it any further. I wouldn't expect her to, but one never knows, do one? And I would ask for her contact information (and if she was traveling with any staff, definitely get theirs) and follow up with a letter or email.

Then, I would have gone back to my seat and tried to engage the people around me in a discussion about the issue I had just talked to Ivanka about. I would encourage them, if they were so inclined, to politely approach her to share their point of view, as well.

I've done this many times with people with whom I disagree and have often been pleasantly surprised at the reaction and results. Many have actually followed up with me. On some occasions, I've run into them again and they remembered me and we have continued the conversation. Often, I figured they were just humoring me, but at least they were listening. And if enough people do that, it can have an impact on them. Many of these people are in a bubble - they only talk to people who agree with or pretend to agree with them. And those who don't agree with them are outside of the bubble screaming at them. Situations like this provide an opportunity to actually permeate that bubble. I choose not to waste such opportunities by screaming at them from inside the bubble, which doesn't result in any of the goals I'm trying to achieve.

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How I would handle being on a flight with Ivanka Trump (Original Post) EffieBlack Dec 2016 OP
The OP makes the assumption they would have the opportunity to actually converse LaydeeBug Dec 2016 #1
No, I'm not making that assumption EffieBlack Dec 2016 #2
The only opportunity you would have is to say, "hi" in that regard... LaydeeBug Dec 2016 #3
Not true EffieBlack Dec 2016 #5
Children of a president are not "public servants". former9thward Dec 2016 #6
You're right...but THIS ONE IS. Normally, it is unseemly LaydeeBug Dec 2016 #7
But F9W is correct - an airplane is not a public space in the normal sense of the word EffieBlack Dec 2016 #8
If she's taking over the role of First Lady she is. n/t Coventina Dec 2016 #10
Really? former9thward Dec 2016 #14
The issue I was addressing was whether she was a public servant or not. Coventina Dec 2016 #15
You might have a chance if you offered to buy a truck load of her crummy shoes or something. Hoyt Dec 2016 #4
Or even just to open with "I like your new winter line, saw it a few weeks ago." JudyM Dec 2016 #18
Ah, someone with social skills. Hoyt Dec 2016 #19
I actually did see her line and thought it was decent. I'd never buy a stitch, though. JudyM Dec 2016 #20
I think I'd just be violently air-sick whilst in her proximity. Coventina Dec 2016 #9
I would just keep giving her the stink eye every time I passed her kimbutgar Dec 2016 #11
You would be rebuffed in the same way that most people brush aside those annoying Jehovahs witnesses mtnsnake Dec 2016 #12
I've had many interesting political discussions with seatmates - EffieBlack Dec 2016 #13
Thank you for injecting some sanity into this discussion. Crunchy Frog Dec 2016 #16
Thank you. EffieBlack Dec 2016 #17
 

LaydeeBug

(10,291 posts)
1. The OP makes the assumption they would have the opportunity to actually converse
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 10:33 AM
Dec 2016

and engage in a conversation.

That's pretty lofty. And while that would be perfect in a perfect world, this ain't that.

She is a public person in a public place. She transitioned to public servant when she got on the campaign trail. Was that guy perfect? Nope. But she's a public servant now in a public place and that comes with the territory.

 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
2. No, I'm not making that assumption
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 10:37 AM
Dec 2016

But in this situation, there is an opportunity to say something to her, even if very briefly. It's not a perfect world, but it IS an airplane, and while there may not be a lengthy conversation (although, depending on the circusmtances, there could be), there can be a brief dialogue.

If you have the time to yell at her, you have the time to talk to her.

Being a public person does not mean that people now should scream at you in public. Certainly, they have a right to do it. But it's non-productive and stupid.

 

LaydeeBug

(10,291 posts)
3. The only opportunity you would have is to say, "hi" in that regard...
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 10:49 AM
Dec 2016

the guy was able to say all that he did *because* he confronted her...not because they were engaged with one another.

You make a stretch in this regard...and it imposes an impossible standard.

It is *easy* to armchair quarterback. It is not so easy to do that in the moment...and considering the uptick the president elect had made in nuclear armament, it is certainly understandable that these things could happen. Ask yourself when there has ever been an example of a first family elect flying on a public flight?

You wanna know *why* you don't hear of stuff like that?

Because it doesn't happen.

Until now.

Again...public person in a public place. Not my favorite type of behavior, but, again, it goes with the territory. I can only *imagine* what would have been said the Malia or Sasha. Oh, but *that's* right. You wouldn't hear of these things because they would never be *bait* like that.

 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
5. Not true
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 11:12 AM
Dec 2016

As I said, I've been in this situation many times and it IS possible to say more than "hi" - IF you're respectful and not rude or disruptive. I've never been on a flight with the family of a president-elect - although, unless they charter their own plane at their own expense, they do fly commercial since they can't use government aircraft for their personal travel (except for the First Lady). But I HAVE been on flights with senators, congresspersons, cabinet secretaries, a UN ambassador, the family of a vice president and others. And while I didn't interact with them every time, I often have and even when I didn't, someone on the flight did go over to speak with them and the communications were always cordial, even when they disagreed.

I'm not "armchair quarterbacking" - I'm speaking from experience.

And that guy didn't accomplish anything. He just yelled at Ivanka and got his ass thrown off the plane. Period. No policy was changed. He didn't influence her or anyone else. He got nothing but 15 minutes of fame.

But if some of y'all want to do your advacy by yelling on and then getting thrown off of airplanes, be my guest. I'll handle my business in a more productive manner.

former9thward

(33,424 posts)
6. Children of a president are not "public servants".
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 11:49 AM
Dec 2016

And a airline is not a public place. It is no more public than any office. Airlines will tell you that you have no right to engage in conversation with any passenger that does not want it. And they have the legal right to put you off the aircraft if you do.

 

LaydeeBug

(10,291 posts)
7. You're right...but THIS ONE IS. Normally, it is unseemly
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 11:52 AM
Dec 2016

for kids to work for the administration, but she is, so nice try. No dice.

 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
8. But F9W is correct - an airplane is not a public space in the normal sense of the word
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 12:08 PM
Dec 2016

And no one has the right to accost a passenger or force them into encounters they don't want to have.

Coventina

(27,870 posts)
15. The issue I was addressing was whether she was a public servant or not.
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 02:26 PM
Dec 2016

Not the logistics of accosting her.

kimbutgar

(23,205 posts)
11. I would just keep giving her the stink eye every time I passed her
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 01:06 PM
Dec 2016

Or laugh at her and say "how's your dad in bed"?

mtnsnake

(22,236 posts)
12. You would be rebuffed in the same way that most people brush aside those annoying Jehovahs witnesses
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 01:14 PM
Dec 2016

Other than maybe the person sitting immediately next to you on the plane, I highly doubt that anyone is going to engage in a political discussion with some stranger who approaches them from more than 2 feet away. "Hey, do you wanna talk politics with me?" I don't think so. The best you could hope for would be a smile and a "No thanks."

You are dreaming if you think she (or practically any bigwig) would exchange their contact information with you for the purpose of discussing some political issue with you at a later date over email or snail mail. All they would do with your card is toss it in the trash or hand it over to their security person to keep on their "stalker alert" file.

 

EffieBlack

(14,249 posts)
13. I've had many interesting political discussions with seatmates -
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 02:01 PM
Dec 2016

And public figures usually do share contact information - often it's their staff person's information, which is why I always try to get the contact information for people who are with them, and they will readily give it to you.

As I said, I've done this kind of thing many times, so I know that the "don't bother, don't waste your time, it doesn't work, they won't listen, you can't talk to them, so it's better to just stand in the aisle and yell insults at them" argument doesn't work on me.

But you do it your way and I'll continue to follow my approach.

Crunchy Frog

(26,939 posts)
16. Thank you for injecting some sanity into this discussion.
Mon Dec 26, 2016, 02:51 PM
Dec 2016

I've honestly been shocked at some of the things I've read on here on this subject.

Behaving like an obnoxious thug does nothing to advance our goals.

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