What every Sexual Abuse Survivor Wants You to Know.

[one_voice]

It is the voice in our heads that tells us we are not enough, that we don’t deserve love, that it’s our fault, that no one will love us and that we don’t belong.

In a split second the voice of childhood trauma speaks to us and sabotages our relationships, our careers. The voice has cost us too much—it feels like it has cost us our lives. It has cost us our relationships, abundance, our health, watching our children grow up and dreams paralyzed in time.

I remember feeling like I didn’t have another breath to give, space to love another person or another tear to shed. I remember not having energy to support another person, give another day at work or another day at life.

It is a paralyzing moment when either all our dreams are about to come true—or we are about to lose everything we have ever worked for.

It shows up when least expected.

*snip*

It can show up in a simple touch from another person, in the way a picture hangs or a shirt that someone is wearing. Sometimes it’s going back to the home, where we grew up, that holds the memories of the abuse we experienced and witnessed. It’s all those things that trigger us, day in and day out, when we least expect it.

It costs us everything.

We are always in recovery.

*snip*

It forces us to make unbelievable choices.

At the cost of belonging, of being loved, we will show up, protecting those we love. We will keep silent and lose sleep; we will be stressed and we will get sick. It’s about what will happen, what we will lose and what it will ultimately cost us if we disclose what happened.

*snip*

It is exhausting but healing is worth it.

Healing is worth it. Survivors will create life, love anyway, heal anyway, forgive anyway and trust anyway. Sometimes our very existence can be exhausting. Yet, people will want us to heal on their time. They will ask to hurry up, forgive and move on. However, people don’t understand that it takes a lot of focus, practice and courage for us to show up.

*snip*

more at link

http://www.elephantjournal.com/2015/02/what-every-sexual-abuse-survivor-wants-you-to-know/

[Behind the Aegis]

1. "It shows up when least expected."

Ain't that the damn truth! Even after we have reached the "survivor" stage, there are still moments which can send you reeling. I think I told you a few months back I set off my own traumatic flashback when I grabbed the back of my own head. I hadn't had any 'flashbacks" for years (over 15 years) and I can talk about my assault without breaking down or even showing much emotion, but for some reason, which I could never identify, that day, that moment, I lost it. Thankfully, it only lasted an hour, but damn if it didn't knock me on my ass.

What victims/survivors need to know is we all cope in different ways, and as long as those ways are healthy, then it can only strengthen you and your resolve.

[Sissyk]

3. ..

[Sissyk]

2. "Survivors will create life, love anyway, heal anyway"

I love that line.

Thanks, one_voice!