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Oneironaut

(5,768 posts)
Thu Jul 21, 2016, 06:43 PM Jul 2016

I am a recovering bulimic.

"Recovering" might not even be the right word - the bulimic part of my brain is still broken. It's just that now (thank goodness) I refuse to listen to those evil urges. Every day is a struggle. It's hard to tell yourself that you're normal when you see a fat person in your reflection (my BMI is great - it's all in my head). I have to tell my brain that it's wrong constantly, and that it is ok to enjoy food / not compulsively binge on crap food.

Not sure if anybody is reading this (this seems to be a sleepy DU group), but I got help and so can you. It's not a platitude - it's true.

Not really sure why I'm even posting this, but w/e. I guess I just hope it helps someone somehow. Maybe a random Googler? Go talk to a therapist like I did.

I may regret posting this, but not more than I regret my disorder.

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I am a recovering bulimic. (Original Post) Oneironaut Jul 2016 OP
Even though my BMI is fine, I see myself as huge. ZombieHorde Jul 2016 #1

ZombieHorde

(29,047 posts)
1. Even though my BMI is fine, I see myself as huge.
Thu Jul 21, 2016, 07:26 PM
Jul 2016

I get weak at work sometimes from not eating enough. For some reason I feel compelled to try to live off a cup of soup a day, even though I'm pretty active (I walk 4.5 miles to work, and I'm a nurses aide so I'm running and lifting much of my shit). I went to a party last night and ate a bunch of food, so I'll be good for a while. I feel strong today, but I think I would benefit from some balance in my diet.

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