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Humanist_Activist

(7,670 posts)

86. Wait, so if someone acted the exact same as you, but their kid had to go to therapy...

Reply to NurseJackie (Reply #80)

Sun Mar 28, 2021, 09:27 AM

Mar 2021

because of it, would the study all of the sudden be right?

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Have you ever spanked your child (or any child under your care/supervision)? [View all] NurseJackie Mar 2021 OP

No -- assault is assault obamanut2012 Mar 2021 #1

Ridiculous. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #5

LOL, ok! nt USALiberal Mar 2021 #175

No! BlueLucy Mar 2021 #2

I did once. He ran into the street. Goodheart Mar 2021 #3

That is the ONLY reason to ever strike a child Freddie Mar 2021 #7

Same for me. He rode his bike down a hill, ran through an intersection in front of a car. Nay Mar 2021 #92

I've spanked my children. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #4

See my post 167 Hekate Mar 2021 #168

I have too...my oldest one...rarely. Mostly if something dangerous was done like running into Demsrule86 Mar 2021 #211

I don't have children, have no problem with a spank on the butt. betsuni Mar 2021 #6

I agree. Leaving welts is a beating. The *pop* and sting of an open hand... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #8

At what age is it no longer acceptable to spank somebody? Goodheart Mar 2021 #9

Ohhh, I'd say... probably about the time that they're old enough to NurseJackie Mar 2021 #13

So, you're OK with spanking a 21 year old student? Goodheart Mar 2021 #18

Sure. If the situation calls for it. Absolutely. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #24

You'll be arrested. Goodheart Mar 2021 #44

Sure. Whatever. Look how scared I am... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #155

when they are taller than you...hehe. I well remember my mother chasing my brother Demsrule86 Mar 2021 #212

Seriously, a pop on a fully-clothed butt is "assault"? betsuni Mar 2021 #12

I blame the "everyone gets a trophy" philosophy of Youth Soccer... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #15

That is ridiculous...and if social service gets involved they put them in homes that do worse too... Demsrule86 Mar 2021 #213

I was beaten. My father had a terrible temper. tavernier Mar 2021 #10

Yes, children respond differently to some kinds of punishment. Amishman Mar 2021 #11

Thanks very much for your thoughtful reply. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #16

My 4 year old grandson acts like your nephew and a "swat" from "Poppy" is the only thing that works. kickitup Mar 2021 #23

Yes, definite similarities to my nephew Amishman Mar 2021 #29

"We can't have a good visit until my husband strikes my smart, active grandson a few times." WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #88

Reminds me of an old Onion headline: ret5hd Mar 2021 #14

A child, no. Of course not. But ... J Magarac Mar 2021 #17

I'm not for spanking. Then, there are my daughter and step-daughter. 3Hotdogs Mar 2021 #19

If you manage employees, have you ever spanked them? WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #20

No... Hugin Mar 2021 #21

I can't say, I've never had any children and was never a babysitter. But... George II Mar 2021 #22

Confusion, indeed. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #26

Psychologically, to the victim, there is very little difference between the two and the research... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #27

Ridiculous. --- Nobody is doing that. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #34

What's the difference? If you leave a mark? You are the one who is putting an arbitrary line... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #37

Again, ridiculous. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #41

Again, what's the difference? n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #45

Looks like the Universities of Texas and Michigan got nice hefty grants from the government.... George II Mar 2021 #35

Well, anti-intellectual and science attitudes aren't exclusive to the right, that's for sure. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #38

I don't even know what any of that means. I think there's an intended insult in there but whatever. George II Mar 2021 #49

Uhm, this response is unsurprising to me, and a little sad. n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #53

I'd love to see a study on how discipline was administered in the homes jimfields33 Mar 2021 #40

I'm actually sure its all over the place, given the beliefs of some, I'm sure they were raised in Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #42

You are probably right. jimfields33 Mar 2021 #101

Because people don't all use the definitions you use, read the same studies, etc... Silent3 Mar 2021 #154

What's obnoxious about it? Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #157

+1000 smirkymonkey Mar 2021 #163

Whether it's in the dictionary or not, or if it puzzles you or not... Silent3 Mar 2021 #179

It's common in American culture... tonedevil Mar 2021 #187

There is a lot about our culture that sucks Silent3 Mar 2021 #193

Post removed Post removed Mar 2021 #198

Not where and when I grew up. There never was a definitional difference. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #203

What's the difference between spanking and hitting? WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #32

I'm sure you can point me to where I said "more parents should hit their kids", right? George II Mar 2021 #51

I call it like I see it. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #55

In that case maybe you can answer your own question: George II Mar 2021 #62

There isn't one beyond the shape of a hand. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #65

You didn't. You preferred to use the euphemism, but spanking is hitting. n/t pnwmom Mar 2021 #181

Spanking is a euphemism for hitting. The purpose is to punish with pain. pnwmom Mar 2021 #180

Time to repost this, not only is spanking wrong, it doesn't work. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #25

It works perfectly fine. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #28

I link to 50 year meta analysis by mental health and child development professionals, and you... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #31

LOL! Myself and my children. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #36

That's anecdotal, do you have any actual evidence? n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #39

That's all the evidence I need. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #43

You sound like an anti-vaxxer, just saying. n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #47

I have not attacked you, Humanist_Activist. Why attack me? NurseJackie Mar 2021 #52

I'm saying what you sound like an anti-science advocate, its not a personal attack... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #56

Yes it is. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #58

You display obvious survivor bias in your argumentation. You can at least try. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #63

That insult was hurled at with George II. It won't work with me either. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #68

Doesn't make it any less accurate an observation though. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #71

This thread is curious. TwilightZone Mar 2021 #66

It's pure hypocrisy kcr Mar 2021 #78

Yes, but mostly its cognitive dissonance, when its someone's preferred belief, they really Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #108

I don't have children, and have avoided needing to supervise any either... Silent3 Mar 2021 #178

Much like I do with any human... tonedevil Mar 2021 #185

There are ages where such discussion won't make much sense... Silent3 Mar 2021 #194

Do you think picking up... tonedevil Mar 2021 #197

And my parents and their six children. I have first hand proof, and it only took about 15 years.... George II Mar 2021 #109

Why is it this easy for me? No seriously, just stop, you aren't really helping your case here. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #114

I don't have a "case" here. But I we were to look at the evolution of child behavior, children.... George II Mar 2021 #124

Where is your evidence that kids today are less well adjusted than "back then"... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #128

I mean, seriously, I come with receipts.... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #132

Your experiences mirror mine. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #115

And there it is, generational myths wrapped up in other myths... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #117

I've worked very closely with our local Board of Education over the year, and some of the things.... George II Mar 2021 #135

Link? NurseJackie Mar 2021 #138

Actually I can do better than that. Here are THREE links! George II Mar 2021 #146

I have one... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #148

" I know what I know." Says everyone who justifies bad behavior!!! Nt USALiberal Mar 2021 #177

You and they turned out okay despite this practice, not because of it. pnwmom Mar 2021 #182

We found the right balance. Others apparently cannot and gravitate to one extreme or the other. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #196

It isn't an extreme to find methods of disciple that don't involve hitting. pnwmom Mar 2021 #208

Nobody said it was. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #209

It depends on what you mean by "work." WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #33

The outcome is perfectly fine. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #48

What outcome? WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #54

Haaaaa! NurseJackie Mar 2021 #57

Your careful definition in the OP makes it clear that some people just really want a certain type of WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #59

It's not hitting. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #60

Keep telling yourself that. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #64

I'm just telling you... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #72

According to the definition you insisted we all use, you strike your children. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #79

LOL! NurseJackie Mar 2021 #81

Uhm, if you spanked them, you hit them, I mean, that's just literally true. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #82

Once size doesn't fit all. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #87

LOL, OK, that settles it! Wow!! nt USALiberal Mar 2021 #174

Two children and each once alphafemale Mar 2021 #30

Would you say they were responding more to... Hugin Mar 2021 #67

Oh. I am pretty sure it was the panic level of voice. alphafemale Mar 2021 #126

I was beaten by my step father. I was spanked by my mother. CrackityJones75 Mar 2021 #46

I find this anti-intellectual streak to be fascinating. I mean, if it contradicts your personal... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #50

I am not anti-intellectual at all. CrackityJones75 Mar 2021 #61

Its a meta-study, a study of studies, if you will, and the aggregate is a consensus among... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #69

No evidence is going to change my mind CrackityJones75 Mar 2021 #75

Exactly. n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #77

I find the streak of personal insults to be fascinating. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #70

Uhm, yes they are, what else do you mean when you contradict scientific meta-studies... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #73

Yes. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #80

Wait, so if someone acted the exact same as you, but their kid had to go to therapy... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #86

No. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #89

OK, so what, that parent is an abuser, but you are not, what would be the difference? n/t Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #93

No. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #94

So psychologically traumatizing your own children is permissible? Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #96

LOL! NurseJackie Mar 2021 #99

Again, you make my argument for me, completely arbitrary. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #102

No it's not. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #105

You are being completely arbitrary, defensive and evasive throughout this thread. Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #106

I've done no such thing. I don't judge you. I don't call you names. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #110

Again, you demonstrate your own bias, if people don't use physical "discipline" they are being... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #111

Everyone has their "own bias". NurseJackie Mar 2021 #118

What name have I called you? Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #121

We're going in circles now. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #131

You are literally arguing, in this post! That those who advocate against spanking are advocating... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #136

+1 Arazi Mar 2021 #165

Psst, Jackie. He read a study. Hekate Mar 2021 #173

Anti-intellectual streak?You are going out of your way to be as insulting as possible in this thread Hekate Mar 2021 #172

No, but my son responded well to verbal commands SYFROYH Mar 2021 #91

Just wait until CrackityJones75 Mar 2021 #134

Thank you, CrackityJones Hekate Mar 2021 #171

Raised three kids Chautauquas Mar 2021 #74

It doesn't work for everyone. There isn't a one-size-fits-all approach that... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #84

I agree Chautauquas Mar 2021 #90

This message was self-deleted by its author mnhtnbb Mar 2021 #162

Never. It's repulsive and barbaric Arazi Mar 2021 #76

Interesting question. Had to stop and think GusBob Mar 2021 #83

I was spanked as a child Bettie Mar 2021 #85

You were beaten, not spanked, and I'm so sorry... Hekate Mar 2021 #176

How do you explain to a child that it's OK for an adult to hit them mcar Mar 2021 #95

I never needed to do that. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #97

"I never needed to do that." WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #100

It wasn't necessary. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #103

"And it worked perfectly." WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #113

Actually, it's not about what I need. It's what my children needed. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #116

No child needs their parent to strike them. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #119

Mine did. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #120

I am sorry you believe that. Truly. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #122

I suspect this will be a great disappointment.... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #129

. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #130

Of course it is. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #133

. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #137

Perfectly. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #140

What does that look like? WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #141

What do you think it looks like? NurseJackie Mar 2021 #142

I don't know; that's why I'm asking WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #143

I figured as much. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #145

Oh no, success can look like different things to different people. WhiskeyGrinder Mar 2021 #147

Love you Jackie, but we're going to have to disagree on this one mcar Mar 2021 #149

What's done is done. My mind is not changed. Nor will the past be changed. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #151

Spanking is hitting, it is striking obamanut2012 Mar 2021 #150

Huh? NurseJackie Mar 2021 #152

What spanking teaches is that it is OK for larger humans Bettie Mar 2021 #98

It's wrong, counterproductive, and I did it two or three times Beakybird Mar 2021 #104

How do you feel about permissiveness? NurseJackie Mar 2021 #107

I would imagine that a behavioral goal chart would work. Beakybird Mar 2021 #112

Yes. Instead of a smack on the bottom when a child has a tantrum in the grocery store... NurseJackie Mar 2021 #127

That was funny! Beakybird Mar 2021 #139

my conclusion has been quaker bill Mar 2021 #123

I was indifferent to punishment or reward as a kid. Ask my parents or teachers. hunter Mar 2021 #125

Oh, and another scientific study, straight from the horses' mouth, so to speak... Humanist_Activist Mar 2021 #144

Fantastic thread Jackie! BannonsLiver Mar 2021 #153

Technically a spank but actually a love pat. KentuckyWoman Mar 2021 #156

I spanked when my kiddo was lil' and I regret it vigorously now. Decoy of Fenris Mar 2021 #158

No. I was terribly abused as a child and vowed that I would never do that to anyone else. smirkymonkey Mar 2021 #159

I almost didn't answer because feel bad about it Tree Lady Mar 2021 #160

It teaches a child that violence gets obedience. Blue_true Mar 2021 #161

Neither is mutually exclusive. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #202

Talking to and mentoring a child is not permissiveness, Blue_true Mar 2021 #215

Uh-huh. I know what permissiveness is. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #216

I raised two boys. mnhtnbb Mar 2021 #164

No. I was abused as a kid, and decided I wouldn't hit my kids at all. fishwax Mar 2021 #166

Corollary: what year were you born? Hekate Mar 2021 #167

I'm also seventy mumble years old. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #169

I used to have a stepdaughter (before divorce), but... Buckeye_Democrat Mar 2021 #170

I've always been smarter... tonedevil Mar 2021 #183

I'd never do it vercetti2021 Mar 2021 #184

I frequently rewarded my daughters... tonedevil Mar 2021 #186

I was having emotional problems vercetti2021 Mar 2021 #188

I tried so hard... tonedevil Mar 2021 #189

My mom did her best vercetti2021 Mar 2021 #190

I don't blame my parents... tonedevil Mar 2021 #191

If you use physical "sanctions" to make your kids behave or be good, you're an abuser. Duncan Grant Mar 2021 #192

Sad that others here don't see that. /nt tonedevil Mar 2021 #199

Thank you obamanut2012 Mar 2021 #210

Spanking discharges the adult's anger, frustration, fear or discomfort with no positive effect. Duncan Grant Mar 2021 #214

It's usual now that words have different meanings depending on "feelings." betsuni Mar 2021 #195

Making an occasional swat on the behind equivalent to child abuse is an abomination alphafemale Mar 2021 #200

That's a very astute and thoughtful observation. NurseJackie Mar 2021 #201

Some peoeple in this thread I usually agree with greenjar_01 Mar 2021 #204

What's the goal? Stop behavior or teach? nolabear Mar 2021 #205

This is a great summation. Duncan Grant Mar 2021 #207

Not ever. Not once. kairos12 Mar 2021 #206