General Discussion

llmart

(16,331 posts)

35. My story

Mon Oct 28, 2024, 11:21 AM

Oct 28

I moved from Cleveland to North Carolina in the 80's. My first week working for a big multinational corporation and there was one other new hire, an African American woman same age as I was. At lunchtime I took my lunch and went into the small employee lunch room. I saw this other woman sitting alone so I figured she's new, I'm new I'll sit with her and introduce myself. The rest of the people in the room got very quiet. I thought nothing of it until I went back to my office and I said to one of the guys I worked with who was from New Jersey who also always ate in the lunchroom, "I don't understand why people don't seem to be very friendly" to which he replied, "You have two strikes against you here - you sat with a black woman and you're also a damned Yankee". I truly was flabbergasted. Another incident was where the three of us took the department secretary to lunch for Secretary's Day. She was a bible toting (literally) evangelical who prayed at her desk during lunch hour. On the way to the restaurant she decided to tell an extremely disgusting racist joke. I had now been there for a couple of years and didn't fear for my job, so I called her out on it just by saying, "I find that joke very offensive." Everyone in the car was shocked but I didn't care. I lived there for close to 10 years.

Next I was transferred to the Detroit area where I bought a house next door to a lesbian couple who were extremely helpful to me in showing me where to shop, how to get places, that sort of thing. They only lived next to me for about a year before they moved, but one time they were asking me about my experience living in North Carolina and I said something to the affect of the state is geographically beautiful but the "some people can be very trying" sort of statement. This couple who had been together for 20 years said, "It may be like that in North Carolina but if you get just a little bit farther north of Detroit, you will find the same sort of bigotry." They were absolutely correct. In Michigan I've heard the racist crap equally as much as I heard it in the South.

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Disaffected ProudMNDemocrat multigraincracker bigtree LovelyStuff SimplyHadEnough B.See FakeNoose ailsagirl

102 replies

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Highlight:

Being Black and hearing republicans laughing it up at watermelon jokes at my expense [View all] bigtree Oct 28 OP

It's on all of us to speak up! DaBronx Oct 28 #1

"All of Us to Speak Up" Roy Rolling Oct 29 #99

Real clowns have a real message, and it has to dowith two things - soldierant Oct 29 #102

Did you hear him talking about his white skin malaise Oct 28 #2

I'm Astonished At The Number Of Sheep, Cows, Hogs, Chickens And Goats That Are Voting For The Butcher And The Hunter MayReasonRule Oct 28 #51

I was stunned at first malaise Oct 28 #54

Malaise It's Infuriatingly Heartbreaking MayReasonRule Oct 28 #59

Wow, malaise Oct 28 #65

"I was stunned at first Not any more" B.See Oct 28 #79

That's why I watched it malaise Oct 28 #81

Sick indeed... B.See Oct 28 #84

The media gave these scumbags a pass for far too long malaise Oct 28 #85

We the people B.See Oct 28 #86

Agree malaise Oct 28 #87

You see, Malaise, this is why, for just as many years, B.See Oct 29 #97

Some democrats would like to make this election about economics Keepthesoulalive Oct 28 #3

The MAGA Fascist crowd,... magicarpet Oct 28 #77

The importance of recording history accurately cannot be ignored. twodogsbarking Oct 28 #4

History has often been "recordded accurately" BumRushDaShow Oct 28 #19

Sadly, I don't think we were anywhere near purging racists from this country. They were simply not exposed and now 33taw Oct 28 #5

I wish I could disagree, but I can't. soldierant Oct 28 #92

Probably better to know, but it is scary. 33taw Oct 28 #96

Such old hatred, and they think it's funny. Authoritarians start with lindysalsagal Oct 28 #6

Interesting last sentence slightlv Oct 28 #20

I don't remember the details Dan Oct 28 #31

That's kind of what I remembered... slightlv Oct 28 #53

We are not our great grandfather's Democratic Party. Marcuse Oct 28 #93

And women stayed in indentured servitude. slightlv Oct 28 #94

Thanks for your perspective, bigtree... Harker Oct 28 #7

Deeply distressing jmbar2 Oct 28 #8

My grandparents lived in a time where racist language was common and acceptable. Espoir Oct 28 #9

I understand your thinking slightlv Oct 28 #22

Robert Reich's Substack today soldierant Oct 29 #101

So was I MustLoveBeagles Oct 28 #44

Me too! Linda ladeewolf Oct 28 #69

Welcome to DU moonscape Oct 28 #74

That's because it never ended in the Country Clubs and Board Rooms. haele Oct 28 #78

I cannot even imagine. Moosepoop Oct 28 #10

They are disgusting and a lot of them think they're Christians. surfered Oct 28 #11

Any Christian who is a racist is gonna get the express ride down ArkansasDemocrat1 Oct 28 #13

Not only do I agree with you but you gave me my first laugh of this sad day. efhmc Oct 28 #24

I hope it helped 😃 ArkansasDemocrat1 Oct 28 #25

When I was growing up, we were told as followers of Christ that it was wrong to hate people. We could hate spinach, etc efhmc Oct 28 #80

I'm with you. MLAA Oct 28 #12

Rather than being born evil slightlv Oct 28 #23

Agree MLAA Oct 28 #49

Best thing that happened in my school days. Lunabell Oct 29 #100

I spent four years in the south in the mid 1960's. I hope that by now nearly 60 years later that the civil war level.... usaf-vet Oct 28 #14

Racism just went below the surface... NEVER left. HagathaCrispy Oct 28 #15

This message was self-deleted by its author ArkansasDemocrat1 Oct 28 #16

John Roberts: "Racism is dead." czarjak Oct 28 #17

Lots dead in them brains. Kid Berwyn Oct 28 #21

Yet another thing Roberts was wrong about MustLoveBeagles Oct 28 #41

I am in solidarity with you. ProudMNDemocrat Oct 28 #18

My story llmart Oct 28 #35

Your mom sounds like me when my husband wanted to take a tech job in Saudi Arabia... Hekate Oct 28 #58

My father was a Design Engineer there. ProudMNDemocrat Oct 28 #62

A Martin Luther King quote that moved me 40 or more years ago. Zilli Oct 28 #26

good quote et tu Oct 28 #34

Again, this should be a campaign-ender for Dump, like mocking the disabled reporter Blue Owl Oct 28 #27

SHOULD be... B.See Oct 28 #82

I stand with you, bigtree. Kid Berwyn Oct 28 #28

That whole rally reminded me of "Birth of a Nation" a racist silent movie Sorry bigtree debm55 Oct 28 #29

I'm Southern,white,and offended as hell. BattleRow Oct 28 #30

It's up to us to make our voices heard.. Joinfortmill Oct 28 #32

Yesterday I saw a commercial of black people saying they are not voting for VP Harris kimbutgar Oct 28 #33

actors. nt orleans Oct 28 #36

Constitutional Rights PAC is behind fortheblackpeople.com chowder66 Oct 28 #42

My Dad was a racist Marthe48 Oct 28 #37

So was mine, but I was lucky, he was also a gent Warpy Oct 28 #46

My Dad treated people nicely Marthe48 Oct 28 #50

Most of us who grew up in the 50s-60s had parents with hateful opinions Warpy Oct 28 #67

I grew up in a suburb of Cleveland also. llmart Oct 28 #73

I'm angry too IbogaProject Oct 28 #38

they're even inept, outdated rascists NJCher Oct 28 #39

Bless your mother and her memory, which triggered one of mine. dobleremolque Oct 28 #40

Not one life is better than another liberal N proud Oct 28 #43

I grew up in the South in the segregation years. nolabear Oct 28 #45

Believe it or not, I do think we're getting better. Elessar Zappa Oct 28 #68

On my better days I believe you. nolabear Oct 28 #71

"Our actual joy". There it is. That's why we'll win this in the end. RussellCattle Oct 28 #47

Racist assholes. Martin68 Oct 28 #48

After the last decade, I understand a little... slightlv Oct 28 #52

When I was in the 8th grade, we moved from St Louis Mo to Nashville Tn NHvet Oct 28 #55

Amen, brother Bigtree. ChazInAz Oct 28 #56

Years ago I talked with an Elderly Korean Gentleman PurgedVoter Oct 28 #57

Thank you. Great post. Evolve Dammit Oct 28 #60

excellent post Skittles Oct 28 #61

K&R spanone Oct 28 #63

Kick Demovictory9 Oct 28 #64

They were yukking it up and I wanted to up-chuck. I'm sure you heard the misogyny as well. Hekate Oct 28 #66

Boldness equal to the challenge Desert Dog Oct 28 #70

I will say my kids would not even understand the joke. Bluethroughu Oct 28 #72

Some "hearts and minds" can't be changed, but we can change LAWS. Let's do it NOW. usonian Oct 28 #75

Did your mom have to turn the melons? My dad had a summer applegrove Oct 28 #76

Thank you for telling your mom's story here. They cannot take the joy and wonderfulness away from you. Iris Oct 28 #83

Now we know what they look like without their sheets on mdbl Oct 28 #88

My parents esp my mom taught us to be non-racists... electric_blue68 Oct 28 #89

I am white and I don't believe that any black American loves watermelon Jack Valentino Oct 28 #90

Absolutely terrible Republicans and the people laughing along. AllyCat Oct 28 #91

I weep for the loss of all that is good UpInArms Oct 28 #95

These bigots love to use the first amendment as a shield... DSandra Oct 29 #98