I'm so tired. May I talk?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. My heart goes out to you, my dear Sunriser13...

As much as I can, I understand what you're going through. You've described it very well and it's horrifying.

I'm glad you posted it. As you can now see, there is nearly always someone here, someone who listens.

And that is so important. Someone who listens.

Perhaps you could find a therapist who charges on a sliding scale to listen? They do exist; I've used them.

In any event, do keep writing your thoughts down. There are many helpful people here who might be able to help you.