I'm going to the memorial service this afternoon for someone I've known since Kindergarten.

[JayhawkSD]

2. I was at a Lutheran memorial service some years ago.

A close friend's grandmother died and I went with him and his family to her memorial service at the Lutheran church where they were regular members, and attended every week. Their grandmother was not a member and never went to church. The pastor stood up front and said something the really touched me.

"I want to tell you about two people," he said. "One was an elderly man named Tom, who came to this church every Sunday. He had been here several years and I had called on him at his home a few times. He lived alone, had no family, no living relatives, but he was here for service every Sunday without fail. Suddenly I noticed that he had not been her for two or three weeks, and I went to his home and discovered that he had died. We held a memorial service for him, and the church was almost empty.

"The other person was Agnes, who was not a member of this church. Her family members are of our church and come every week. Agnes passed away, and here wa are holding a memorial service for her. Her family is here and the church is filled almost to capacity.

"That tells me something important," he went on. "Here was Tom, a member of this church but with no family left behind and an empty church at his service. And then we have Agnes, not a church member, but with a family left behind, and the church family turns out in full force to support Agnes' family in their loss.

"It tells me," he said, and this is the point I am making, "that the purpose of a memorial service is to bring together a larger community for mutual support at a time of loss."