I also was unable to be with her. She died alone. I know the pain and guilt. I had finally talked her into coming to live with me, but this meant a cross-country move, so I was in the process of preparing to go get her and her little dog and bring them here to my home. She died suddenly in her sleep they say, but she was alone. I had been trying to make sure she was no longer alone, but I was too late. I also had to make an emergency trip there for her funeral. My brother and I still haven't done anything with her house. It hurts so damn bad. I think about her every day still, and often hear her voice in my head giving me advice or just commenting on something. She was my mom, but she was also my friend. Our love was unconditional. It will get better. I can tell you that. But I think it will always hurt. My heart is with you.Take care of yourself. Remember to eat and to sleep. May peace be with you when you feel lost without her. Love to you.
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