There is already drama & angst over clearing out my Moms' apartment

[Ocelot II]

6. Winding up an estate can bring out some bad behavior in some relatives, heirs,

or would-be heirs. I haven't spoken to a sister-in-law since my mother passed away in 2004 and I was the co-executor of her estate with my dad (who is also gone now). I got some really vicious emails from her after I closed the estate because the estate didn't pay her and her husband (my brother) for some assistance they (along with my other brother and I) provided her while she was ill and for sorting out possessions and helping dad move out of their house after she passed away. She was happy to pick over mom's stuff and take the some of the nicest things, which I didn't feel like fighting over. My brother had never asked to be paid, and estates don't pay surviving relatives for ordinary personal services anyhow, which I tried to explain, but she was irrationally nasty about it. After our dad died six years later she didn't come to his funeral, which was fine with me.

I'm sorry you're having to deal with this; there always seems to be one relative who has to make everything worse.